


Silver Exposure

by StarryNighty



Category: Captain America, Captain America Civil War, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Black Reader, Black female reader - Freeform, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-11-22 22:20:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 7
Words: 25,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20881595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarryNighty/pseuds/StarryNighty
Summary: Dark!Au Marvel, post Blip. Civil War has broken out.





	1. Libbys and Beetles

**Author's Note:**

> This story is alternative universe. I set it in a time where there are still a few more Avengers post Snap.

**T**he Silver State, you had finally arrived. Southern Nevada, dusty, with scattered shrubs and Joshua trees swept past the charter bus window. You zoned out on the fuchsia flooding rocky towers of a canyon turning the rust-colored sand stones a bright orange. The evening sunlight over the landscape would have been beautiful if you had wanted to be there. In this moment you both regretted the service call and missed your small box apartment. As the recycled sticky bus air settled in your nose and on your skin you shifted in the worn thin seat.

You kept your eyes pointed out on the dry land. Mildly relaxed in your surroundings you knew it was a temporary feeling. The further you traveled from home the more aware you became that the country was reaching a point of no return. But you were from Texas, the _big country_ county municipality specifically, where people mostly still flourished despite influences from the Liberties. You hadn’t experienced much of the effects of the fighting there. It was highly suspected to be the seat of power for the Liberties, though you never saw evidence to support the claim.

You held from the largest amassed independent settlement. Clean water, amply supplies of energy and people, lots of them, most had arrived in the last year seeking refuge. It was a paradise compared to other parts of the country. But for the last few days of getting off and then getting back on this bus had given you perspective. Something you seriously assumed each side lacked.

You noticed that most things that passed the bus window was covered in thick black soot and filth. Unkempt, and uncared for. There were hollowed-out homes too, their skeletons poking out of the skyline of ghostly towns, ashen totems of a time that had little regard for life. 

But as the bus traveled nearer to the Bosch Settlement, dread grew and began to whip around in your chest. Far louder than the rumble of the bus helicopters cruised above and the distance buzzed drones that stroked your anxiety further.

You thought the joint armistice of the U.S. and their Liberty enemies would have been cleaner. And yet assorted shanties sprung up along the outside of the settlement. The smell inside the cabin of the bus sank into a musty odor, rank, it had you holding your nose. You looked back to the other passengers, even to the man sitting to your left. Though he did not move, instead, his warm eyes regarded you indifferently.

“Cost of war and all that shit.” He shrugged and then leaned his head back shutting his eyes. “Someone had to pay for it.” mumbled the man.

Your eyes fell to the back of the chair in front of you. Someone was paying, because now each side was losing. After the epic failure of the Avengers the country ground to an agonizing stop. Half of all life on the continent disappeared. Then when people realized it was not just the U.S. but the world and the Universe, people gave up, while others began to fight back. The country was ripe for a fight it could not handle or could truly stop.

Of course, you weren’t one of those who fought.

You had lost everything in the Blip. Your friends, your family. You were alone. There was little fight left in you to argue with the technicalities of what revenge looked like.

But other people, far more motivated, figured out the power in brutal retribution. It didn’t take a year, after the Blip the protests against government misdeeds started. Then, strategic minds took advantage of the distraction. The Liberties, libbys, named by the media, struck first. They burned empty government buildings. It did not affect you, at least, not at first.

The government reacted, banned all protests, declared martial law enacted by the remains of the US military. They swarmed in their signature gear of black shiny armor that gave them the nickname, beetles.

It only stirred the pot more by angering the Liberties. So they bombed the industrial resources; farms, ammunition supplies, water storage facilities and then factories and some of those did have people in them. That move hit you hard, it took from your community. So much for the equality and freedom they wanted. The mass attacks halted what little supplies your town could gather. And overnight any opportunity to move beyond the Blip had vanished.

Civil war erupted. Whether deliberate or not that’s what happened. And it occurred faster than anybody could have imagined. Even for the supers. It was rare to even see them out anymore. And within another year the country was shapeless with no direction and little trust from either side.

But here you were, almost five years since the Blip, you were an old hand at managing this level of anxiety you lived at now. The twist in your gut wasn’t anything compared to the first few weeks without a stable supply of water. Or seeing the most at risk starve. You lived. Though now you were much less apt to meet new people, it wasn’t shyness, it was just smart to not make friends. It was easier that way.

Both sides ruined infrastructure. Their little skirmishes, the tit for tat retaliation took their toll. Roads, hospitals, factories, and services were in desperate repair. It was already on the decline anyway without the people to work. But each side decided a short truce was in order. And at a designated area, it was in their best interest to gather the country’s greatest resource, people.

Last week the council members of the county gathered as requested, albeit ordered to do so by the Libby leaders, to choose. You didn’t want to go. Even if your existence was listless you didn’t want to lose your life over stubbornness, so you obeyed. You had skills. Before the Blip, your café was successful. Well, as great as a small town hole in the wall could be. So your records indicated as food service. That made you of use and to be of service to the cause.

You were told to bring two weeks’ worth of clothing and that toiletries would be supplied to you. But you didn’t leave it to chance so you packed light. The fear that shit could turn bad kept you still inside your head and ready for anything. Easy enough. Just like the supposed olive branch of a settlement you were being hauled off too.

They wanted clean potential workers so you tucked your best in there too. At the last rest area, you changed. And currently, the skirt you wore, rode up uncomfortably over your thighs. The exposed warm umber skin pebbled from the cold circulated air. The heels on your feet made your toes numb but you wore them regardless. Besides, you were too scared to find what your feet would find on the floor of the bus if you took them off.

Your eyes shifted back into the bus. Shades of navy and gray suits for the men, various blouses for women caught your eye again. But the man to your direct left wore a thin over-sized black jacket, gray lose pants like fatigue material and bright cobalt blue hiking boots. He was strange, a stand out within the cabin. The man appeared clean, unbothered by his surroundings. His dark tawny brown skin, glowed, not dulled by time or war it only seems to become more accentuated by the gold sharp edges of the necklace around his clavicle. Were those teeth? No, _claws_.

Smoothly he stroked back a few brown short, thin dreads from his forehead. He sighed, an exasperated puff of air from being watched and you quickly turned your eyes from him when he too began to look toward you.

You forced your wandering eyes back out the window. You sat like that for an hour. It was darker now, night had fallen so you concentrated on the bumpy asphalt, the trash in the ditches, and in the distance, the lights. The Bosch Settlement grew brighter. Maybe it was anticipation that bubbled in your stomach, more than likely it was the hot salami sandwich and warm water you had for lunch. Once again, avoiding the man near, your eyes darted to the other passengers. As a wave of movement carried over the crowded bus in nervous motions, they too were eager a few of them even started to gather their belongings. 

Without fail, another checkpoint sat a few yards away. The two lane highway lay heavily guarded by US military trucks for those leaving, and Libby militia terrain vehicles for those entering. There was an automatic jump in your blood pressure. You looked back out the window as the bus pulled up at the makeshift wooden and concrete stall. Libby volunteers dressed in the signature brown combat gear began to crowd around the bus. 

The bus jolted to a stop. Your head jerked with the motion as your eyes darted through the window into the dark. From the cloak of black in the desert German Sheppard’s ran before their handlers, sniffing and rooting out illegal contraband. You didn’t have anything on you. But you held your breath anyway.

The dry patch in the back of your throat moved to the roof of your mouth. Two Libby militia men boarded the bus, dressed in black with shades of muted wood and pebble. The first man in the desert fatigues pushed his way down the aisle snatching papers out of people’s hands then tossing it back at them. His automatic rifle hung down the middle of his chest occasionally clinking on the metal armrest of the passenger seats.

You tried to lean back, appear dutiful. But your eyes rushed from his gun to the people he interacted with.

Four seats away, the militia hooked his thumb at the taller bulkier companion.

“Take this one.” He shouted and moved on.

The other man quickly approached the area, he pulled across the elderly woman sitting on the other side of his target. A woman, brown-headed with tears in her eyes pleaded with the militia but he yanked her into the aisle then pushed her toward the exit. 

His voice carried to you softly, under his breath. “Relax. Don’t seize up and they won’t react.” said the man next to you.

You tongued at the dryness in your mouth. Still, you looked passed the coming figure, lost in the moment. Suddenly you realized that you were staring at a man a few seats up in the aisle.

Blue eyes, darkened but light and despite the approaching Libby, still he continued to watch you just the same.

“Papers!” said the man gruffly. “Where are they, we don’t have all fucking day.” He continued.

Breaking eye contact you hurriedly unfold the paper at the same time handing it to him. He snatched it out of your hands, his eyes read from left to right. The blond hair man looked at you then back at the paper. You were quickly unraveling at the length of time he was taking. Careful not to seem too anxious you tugged at your jacket righting yourself.

Finally, he tossed it back at you. It slipped through your fingers, hit your lap and slid into the floor. Grumbles began to start with the man directly behind you. 

“I won’t! You stupid sons of bitches.” Cursed the older man his voice weathered and aged continued to argue. “’think you own everybody! I’m going to the Settlement for work!” He tried to speak again after that, but the sound of a hammer heating a raw roast stopped him.

“I’m..a citizen..” he moaned weakly.

You didn’t dare turn around. Your eyes flew to the window, the shadowy reflection caught your attention. The elderly man stood out the most. He was hunched over the back of his seat with the Libby cracking a smile. Boldly, a streak of blood, red glistening, dotted and smeared on the glass of the bus window.

The second militia came back on the bus, grabbed up the older man who could barely stand and dragged him off as well. The last twenty minutes of checks went much smoother. The Libby’s stepped off, the bus pulled away and you finally felt a bit of the panic subside.

When the bus finally pulled out of the checkpoint you hoped that this was the scariest this journey could possibly get. But the pang of fear in your chest had now spread as a numbing pain settling in your back. Nothing felt right and you were stuck right in the middle of it.

You weren’t aware when the bus pulled into the mall. You only just recognized the empty parking spaces as the bus stopped moving. The building, now devoid of any noticeable markers was simply bricks, untrimmed trees, and bushes. The dull piss-yellow light flooded out of the large floor-length windows, and the double glass doors where only the bottom level was illuminated.

“Remember that your passes to the motel down the street are at the kiosk!” shouted the driver, and then opened the door.

You sat there. The man next to you immediately pushed his way through the line. Your eyes followed him until you noticed the curious staring eyes of the man from across the aisle. He was watching the other passengers. Beneath the bill of his green and dirty white cap, his eyes studied one after the other. What you could see of his hair poked down the back of his head, brushing over a shorn cut. He was just as different, like the man who was near you during the trip. A gray jean jacket, probably it had black at one time but it was ratty on the corners. Maybe it was his favorite you thought. He appeared healthy too, well-fed and bulky in his shoulders but slim in the waist. The color of his skin, paler than yours but tanned compared to others. He was handsome, disarmingly so and his attractiveness made him stand out all the more.

He turned his head in your direction. Quickly, you averted your eyes down to your bag feeling the energy of being caught you hitched it around your shoulders crossing the sling over your chest. Some of the people thinned out enough for you to step out. Ignoring the man to your left you kept moving, though you noticed it was completely free to walk out before you. He hung back, he waited until you approached then stepped behind you.

The feeling was back in your gut again, the gnawing fear, but you were sure it had not disappeared in the first place. Simply laid in wait. And it increased by ten when you felt him hovering at your back.

“They’re here too?” yelled a man from behind you. “Fuck! Can’t they just leave us be!” his voice boomed again.

You glanced out of the windows, Libby militia patrolled just beyond the mall doors. So you moved swiftly, grazing the tops of a few chairs as you passed and made room for your bag as you walked.

“Those fucking animals!” a shout erupted from far behind you once more. And so you kept moving, your foot nearly to the first descending step. “GET me off here!” the line suddenly jumped forward, pushing you down the stairs you missed the second.

Your bag, your body flung forward and you would have fallen right off the bus missing the stairs completely. Instead, you dangled, and then your feet grazed the last step until you were fully back on the platform.

The arm around your waist was hard, stiffer than flesh and much stronger it snaked away from you. Steadily, you jumped from the stairs and off the bus.

Turning to thank him, you whipped around but he was already heading inside. His long strides carried him passed the militia and into the mall.


	2. Job Fair

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You attend the job fair.

“Fill out the form. I.D. here-“ a thick, callous finger rubbed over a blank line at the top of the page. “Put your municipality here, then initial at the bottom.” said the croaky voice.

You looked up at the wrinkled faced man, flushed pink around his eyes and gaunt he smiled slowly. A well-practiced expression you could tell he had given everybody today.

It was the twelfth form you filled out this evening since getting off the bus. You did as you were told and handed it back to him with a smile.

“I’m going for the sanitation work. ‘Heard it’s mostly inside work.” said Tammie.

Between the lines for kitchen duty at the capitol and cafeteria work in New York, you met Tammie. She was lanky, long strawberry red hair, with a decent pair of freckled tits crowning out of her low cut flowery top. Her tight jeans were newish, though distressed at least she made an effort but still looked overworked. She struck up a conversation with you about the cafeteria jobs in New York. She was going after those too but admitted she didn’t have the experience and would most likely end up being a maid.

You tolerated her presence. The irony was that you did like making new friends. But that was before when shit made sense and your nerves weren’t constantly rattled. So you listened, eager to hear something different, allowed yourself to imagine better times by speaking with her. After you finished your paperwork there, you walked with her to the food court where a government catered dinner awaited. And you could smell it before you got there. Not like a school cafeteria at all. It honestly smelled like trash as you drew closer. Your eyes fell on a sign for the meal of the day: _hot dogs, canned corn, and rolls drink: water_. 

Tammie grabbed your arm gently, she leaned in as she whispered. “We’ve gotta get the fuck out of here.”

“What? We have to stay here..” you started to speak, but Tammie tugged your arm.

“This is Bosch. Before the Blip my family was from this area, I know this place, like the back of my hand…” she said and gave the dinner line one last look. You caught another whiff of the food and decided to follow Tammie.

You and Tammie found a rear exist down a darkened narrow hallway that led to the outside. It was night, and you looked up to the sky where heavy clouds blocked out the velvety blackness you had hoped to see there. Though the air was fresh, it carried with it the smell of dirt and dankness like promise of rain. Inside the mall was not patrolled, but the outside was most certainly. But you quickly realize there was no rhythm to their guarding. Both you and Tammie slipped passed in between two armed guards and stepped out on to the giant pitch-black parking lot.

You weren’t the only one out. While Tammie spoke about her time in Florida last year your eyes, wide in the dark, peered at the lights of a small community of rickety homes beyond the pavement. Softly, voices carried to you from there, people strolled between them and looking behind you a man was walking as well.

For a moment, it did feel familiar. Like you were simply having an evening out with a friend but nothing was right about it. You knew better. You were away from home, far from what you knew as far as surrounding go. But the grumble in your stomach marched you on. You watched Tammie’s restless shifting of her arms as she spoke at a lightning speed.

You drew quiet. As soon as your feet hit the sand and into the neighborhood, you knew there were less hospitable places but regardless you did not feel wholly welcomed. Those voices you heard from before stopped, the children you had seen running had disappeared as both you and Tammie wandered the streets.

“I know it’s here.” Tammie suddenly spoke, twisted her head back down the long street her eyes darting from house to house. “I use to get the best shit here. Fuck, I was high for days.”

“What. We came here for food. Because-“ you started to argue, and struggled with the heels at the same time as you stomped on the rocky street.

“Calm down. I’m sure someone will come out soon.”

“Why would they come out? We are strangers Tammie, come on let’s go back.”

“They’ll come because we are strangers.” She hissed. And as if on cue a tall man, pale in the dark approached.

“Hey, beautiful.” He said in a sing-song voice. His roaming eyes had you pulling your bag in front for distance. “You don’t see heels like these around here and a short skirt. Thick as fuck too. Sweet.”

His eyes were dulled, empty and he appeared damp and dry all at the same time – strung out.

“Bobby?!” Tammie shouted, and then squealed as she jumped into his arms. “I tried..I tried to get back here..oh my god baby. I missed you so much!”

“Missed me? You still owe me for last time.” You watched as Bobby tugged on Tammie’s long hair and pulled her into a sloppy kiss. “But you can make it up to me.” His other hand drifted to the hem of her top slid a few fingers over her slim waist.

“Wait..my friend here. She’s looking for food. They served shit. We need it Bobby…you know anybody?” she asked, and then looked back at you with a grin.

Bobby jerked his head back to a few houses. He took Tammie’s hand, you glanced around checking your area before you too once again followed her.

You walked for a bit, every step your feet slid in the heels and burned from the sand between the knuckles of your toes. The winding path took you deep into the inner homes. You struggled to listen but honestly, you just wanted to change, eat and sleep. But you kept walking after all this was on you. It was your choice to follow Tammie.

Bobby paused in front of a white home. He knocked on the rotten wooden rail three times before walking up the steps, he knocked again then opened the door. It opened and you realized it was nothing like the outside. The home was well kept, with lanterns in the corners, clean and with decent furniture. And it smelled wonderful too. Your stomach growled as you stepped over the threshold to a room full of people.

“We have company,” announced Bobby, he pulled of his dingy flannel shirt and carefully laid it across the back of a soft chair.

“That’s fine. More the merrier, as long as they eat and go. No more stragglers Bob!” yelled a man, as you walked through the living room and near the kitchen drawn in by the smell. You saw sleeked back gray-haired man leaning over a stove.

The tall old man favored Bobby in a way. The same shaped eyes, nose though old. He grabbed up a plastic old butter bowel and dumped a few cups of something steaming into them.

“Thank you.” You said, the old man looked at you, then topped off the bowl and turned to you fully.

“Whatever the world says, at least you knew we fed you.” He grumbled and handed the hot bowl to you. “There aren’t spoons so slurp.” And turned back to his stove.

You took it and moved to a doorway outside the kitchen that led to the hallway. You leaned against a wall and tried to concentrate on both eating and what you should do afterward. You paid little attention to the conversation save the comments about the government and who they had killed today. Beneath the exterior of the house laid this little marvel. And you wondered if the rest of the homes, the people were the same.

“We gotta go. This is Devan! I knew him from an old job..he’s got something awesome for us. Come on, girl!” said Tammie, jerking the bowl from your lips. Only managing to take the last sip you got ushered out the back door.

“What about Bobby?” you asked, snatched your arm out of her boney fingers forcing her to stop.

“I have to get back to the mall. I need my voucher if I want a bed to sleep on tonight.”

Tammie tinkered with her nails as she looked to the ground then back at Devan. “Please, I know…you don’t know me but I need this. Did I get you something to eat? Please come with me. I don’t want to be alone.”

You were absurdly out of your depth. But as you watched Tammie you decided that you didn’t want to leave her here. A hangover from before the Blip, you still had a heart.

“Fine. But I have two hours before 9 p.m. I have to be back to get my bed. Okay?” you asked, and then stepped closer to Tammie and stared daggers at her.

Her thin lips cracked into a smile. “I promise!” she coaxed.

At this point, you had been walking for close to thirty minutes. You wouldn’t know where you were if somebody asked you, but you continued to follow Tammie. The winding paths between the homes turned into travel trailers and smaller homes with one or two bedrooms at the most. It was darker here too. At least the houses, in the beginning, had lanterns maybe even enough power to run a light. As you passed the thin windows into people’s yards only candlelight from dully lit windows led your way.

You walked behind Devan and Tammie. Occasionally you caught their voices, but nothing discernible so you listened to the sounds from within the homes. Sometimes it was a mother telling off her kids. One time you heard people fucking, Tammie giggled as the moans of a man rose up high, but mostly it was people arguing. You tried to ignore it and get to where ever Tammie was leading you.

Just before you were about to raise your voice Devan turned to the right, kicked open a door at the back of the raggedy house. Tammie held you by the arm pushing you into the house. “I just need a taste. We can go back after.” She said as you entered the home.

The inside was way different than the first house. The vibe was heavy, dark with a fluorescent solar lamp in the corner lighting the thick layer of smoke hanging in the kitchenette. The house stank of rot, of weed…and maybe something else. It smelled dead inside.

A few voices were coming from a room with a closed-door right off the kitchen. But you followed Tammie who swayed behind Devan as he walked to that door.

And as it swung open you got a glimpse of the black faded jacket, his pale eyes, and wealthy complexion. It was the man from the bus, the one behind you that helped you to the last step. There were a few others here too. Just as empty looking as Devan, and just as gaunt. You wanted to say something to the man from the bus because he paused too as you entered and he appeared to recognize you as well. Tammie started to flirt hard with Devan, so your eyes were pulled away toward the phony sweet voice she used with him.

You suddenly realize you were watching a professional. She didn’t tip-toe about her wants; Tammie was on fire with her fluttering lashes, the delicate touch to Devan’s neck as she lightly pecked his thick jaw. And she completely ignored you as she grabbed up the straw, the old DVD case and took a long draw off of the blue powdery line.

With your eyes fixed on the line disappearing up Tammie’s nose, you spoke. “What is that..” you asked. Tammie threw back her head, closed her eyes as she leaned back against the wall.

“Chitauri bones mixed with cocaine,” she giggled, threw her leg out in front of her and relaxed.

Devan laughed, as he finished a line of it too. “They call it chit….get it. Shits…” Ya, and it smelled like shit too. And you failed to see the humor in snorting alien bones but they both roared with laughter from the expression on your face.

While feeding the other part of her hunger Tammie asked you through another fit of giggles to join. You shook your head _no_ and then looked back at the man in the corner of the room who sat near Devan on an upturned bucket.

You were still standing while the rest of them sat on shitty chairs and dirty blankets on the floor. The smell was hitting you hard now, so you turned and just walked right out of the room.

The walls shook, the sound of thunder rattled the glass as you walked down the short hall back toward the kitchen. Maybe if you changed your shoes and ran you could make it back to the mall. The creak from the door you came from opened and then shut behind you. Before you could check if it was Tammie your upper right arm was caught in a vice, the force behind it propelled you forward toward the front-rear kitchen door.

“Why are you here?” His voice was short like delayed humor clipped a seriousness tone. You turned, hesitated when you realized it was the man from the room with Tammie, the man from the bus.

But you didn’t have time to assess the reasons, or even wonder why he was pulling you back through the house as his grip got tighter.

“Hey, Tammie—“ you shouted as he rushed you.

“She’s done. You should be worried about yourself.” Said the man and shoved you out the door and into the rain.

Your toes sunk into the sticky dirt, then your heels right after. “What the fuck…” you tried to jerk your arm out of his grip as he came up next to you. “Who are you? Let me go!” you yelled.

Your hand flew to his hold, you clawed at his gloved hand and then when that didn’t work you started slapping at his hand.

The man snapped you up to him knocking you out of your heels. The wind began to whip up around his face streaking rain across his full lips, his angular nose, it poured over his thick brows. He brushed a few soaked strands of dark hair from his face as he hauled up in front of him.

“Shut up.” He ordered, flecks of rain shot into your eyes as he spoke. “Do you even know where you are?” You struggled to reply, one hand on your bag the other pressed against his chest you only stared up at his angry face. “You’re staying with me.”

You didn’t try to speak at all after that as he forced you to walk in front of him barefooted. The only possible outcome you could think of was trafficking. You berated yourself for the stupidity of it all. And you hated on the moment you met Tammie.

So much for making new friends.

In the dark, it all looked the same. And especially in the cascades of rain pouring. Trailers and small homes still hugged in close as you and the man hurriedly rushed through the maze. You started to take another right when he grabbed you again, pulled you to the left crashing in front of him as he pushed you against a door. 

You were shielded. Up against him and the wood of the door he still held you as he banged on it with his other hand. A fraction of a second before the door opened you looked up at him. The light poured in from a crack as it opened casting a soft white light over his face. He was already staring at you with those clear bright eyes. Under his gaze, you shifted nervously away but he kept you there against him, slowly his eyes fell to your mouth, your neck to the open gap in your soaking wet blouse.

You jumped at the bark of a laugh.

“Bucky?” a gravelly voice shouted right behind you. The door flung open you turned toward it as the tall skinny man continued to shout. “Fuck it’s great you fuckin’ showed up. The god damn government beetles have been crawling all over this mother fucker.”

Your head shifted back up to him. “Bucky?” you asked softly, confused at the nickname you didn’t have time to ask more when he shoved you inside the house.

“Get the fuck outta the way,” said Bucky to the man as he moved you further in and slammed the door behind him.

Bucky pointed to the couch for you to sit. “Where’s Raw?” he asked pulled off his jacket and threw it in a corner.

“Who’s that?” the man gestured toward you but Bucky shrugged.

“No one. Go get him.”

The man held up his hands, nodded as he retreated into the dark.

You stared at the shadows where he walked off into. Not that it was darker there than in the room you now stood. But you glanced away, getting your bearings to the area. The air was thick, smoke sat in layers in the air with the flicker of an old box television. It seemed to be the only source of light besides the glow from a room off from this one. Your eyes rolled over to Bucky but he was still staring into the dark so you removed your bag and headed to the couch. You immediately sunk into the old springs. It smelled old, like the house but you welcomed the weight off your burning feet.

Bucky moved too, though sat in the faded armchair to your right. He plucked at his wet layered long-sleeved shirt. His eyes landed on you again as he swept a hand through his air slicking back.

“I need to change. This is ridiculous. I need to go back to the-“

“Shut your mouth.” He said spoke softly, then a smile spread as his eyes floated up passed you.

“Raw. Ronin…or whatever the fuck you go by these days,” said Bucky.

Heavy footsteps approached behind you. They even thumped on the shallow floor shaking the couch a bit. You stared at Bucky, he was still smiling as the man walked to him and bumped hands.

But he wasn’t alone. The skinny man from the door swung over the couch and landed directly at your right. His hand wrapped around your shoulder, the smell of his musty air pits rose up to your nose.

You moved, tried to anyway, but the man wrapped his other hand around your waist holding you there.

“Hey, baby..how old are you?” he asked, his funky breath blowing in your face as he spoke. His hand tugged at the heavily wet coiled hair around your face.

Another man flopped down to your other side. He was just as thin, appeared like he hadn’t slept for days, and just as the other man he was just as smelly. “You ain’t going nowhere.” He smiled.

Your eyes shot back to Bucky but he was still speaking low moving his hands as he motioned back at the front door. You watched the man on the right his hand now rested on your thigh. Ringing in your ears started, quickly you could feel yourself beginning to come apart as the two men continued to have their way.

“Old enough to play I bet,” said the one on the right. Your eyes shifted back to Bucky, he was watching you out of the corner of his eye as he continued to speak to Ronin.

The man on the right squeezed, you pushed at his hand. “Let me see your papers,” he laughed, as he mocked the same tone the militiamen used. “Stop!” you shouted pushing their hands off you again shifted your weight forward to escape.

But their boney rough hands pulled you back to the couch. The man on your left leaned in, his lips almost touching your ear whispered. “You want to suck it?”

You looked over to Bucky. Ronin suddenly broke away as he walked over to you. He slunk as he walked, creeping toward you with hunched shoulders. His hair was shaved on the sides the rest was long swooped up into peaks down the center of his head. Begging to be set free you looked up at him hoping for some understanding but he met your fiery resistance with a cold gaze.

You couldn’t look away as he squatted down in front of you. “What are you doing pretty girl?” he asked as he took your cool hand within his hot palms. “You know me?” he squeezed. “I’m Raw Ronin…wanna know how I got the name?”

You didn’t want to cry but the tears came all the same. The man on your right was tightening his hold around your shoulders until his arm wrapped around your neck. The guy on your left had his hand wandering over your thigh and squeezed roughly, bruising the soft brown skin there.

"I like to string'em up,” said Ronin, his other hand pulled up between the huddle, your eyes fell to a short straw. "Sweet women just like you. Make'em beg until their throat’s raw…sometimes till they bleed.“

Ronin put his lips on the end of it he took in a quick breath, and then he blew something into your face and up into your nose, your mouth. Some of it floated up, lavender-colored powder surrounded your face. You couldn’t believe the color, you hadn’t seen that in shade in years. It appeared as soft dust hanging in the air. You stared at it as it swirled from your breathes. The effects hitting hard your eyes fixed on the pattern. 

"Are you feeling it now?” his voice came to you slow, sensual just as supple as the thumping in your ears. Lazily your focus returned to Ronin, who smiled with glowing green eyes.

“Are your eyes really like that….I didn’t not-notice before.” You slurred out your words, the tears on your face felt cool as you stared at Ronin.

You don’t even see Bucky move but he was there a gloved hand dipped in between Ronin and the guy to your right. He gripped your wrist, once again you felt the hardness of his hand and he pulled you up from the group.

The thunder sounded louder now, it shook the house as it rolled over and through you. Whatever was blown in your face was turning you inside out. You fell against Bucky, laughed as you tilted your head back and blinked slowly. He shoved your bag into your arms forcing you to focus on holding it as he began to walk you into the dark.

“I’ll expect you there,” said Bucky as he walked you away further into the house. “Make sure you do it” he threw the words over his shoulder back toward Ronin.

He held you around the back, that hard hand also held your left arm. But you stared at him unashamed how it looked. An unknown source of light bathed his sharp features, pale skin the mournful down-turned mouth surrounded by a few days worth of a beard you couldn’t stop taking him in. Statuesque, maybe, if the word applied to anything in the world these days it would be him. You felt light as air on the inside like you were made of bubbles held together by chewing gum. And yet, you feel wetness along with a growing ache in your groin. You smile at him. You were enamored.

Bucky did a double-take at your reaction. “Ah, shit.” He whispered. And shortly passed the dingy kitchen he pulled you away from him, pressed you against the nearest wall. You stared at him, wholly taken in by creeping smile along his lips.

“You’ve been dusted.” His voice seeped into your ears. Your eyes dilated, pores wide open like a sponge you took him in. Your senses were heightened. The smell of his skin, sweaty, musky beyond the decrepit smog of smoke of the house. It hit your nose last and you didn’t care so much anymore that the place stank. You only wanted him.

Bucky stepped to the side knocked a door open and pushed you into the bathroom. You were all over him before he shut the door. His lips, they were so wonderfully hot you moaned into his mouth. The bristles of his stubble burned and scraped along your top lip in a bruising kiss. Your hands rushed to his shirt, you tried to yank at it, tried to rip it from his hard body.

But he pulled you off him again, held your sweaty face in his hands as he licked inside your mouth. You couldn’t handle the sensation. Your head tossed back exposing the smooth honey-brown skin of your neck, the heat within rose to the surface flushing your skin with droplets.

A faded gargled groan at the back of your throat bubbled up to your lips. “I’m on fire…fuck me. Please..” you begged.

Bucky smiled, switched his hands up, he brought them up under your top and tugged at your nipples under the bra.

“Shit makes your cunt a wet mess doesn’t it?” he asked, kissing along the damp skin of your neck. “You don’t even know me and look at you.”

Bucky dropped his hands wrapped them around your waist twisted you around and shoved you against the filthy sink. “They were goin’ to fuck you. All three of them…but I get you now. This shit turned you into a fuckin’ greedy little slut.”

You wanted to fight back. This was not you. But the burn in your belly said differently. The yearning to be filled had you eagerly brushing your ass against him. If he would have been a better man he might have stopped. But Bucky scrapped his fingertips up your thighs hard bringing your skirt high at your waist. He nudged a boot between your legs widening your stance further making you more open to him.

Your breath hitched in your throat as you felt cool metal touch your heated throat. The mirror before you, shattered, but you could still see the silver fingers wrapping around. Faintly you register his fingers near your cunt, swiping and tugging at your underwear before sliding it to the side.

The warm tip of his cock grazed your folds, already slick he pushed all the way inside you.

“So tight…” he groaned. Your entire body vibrated. He filled you up, stretched you submerging you further into the heat. Hooded eyes stared back at you in the reflection, they were yours. You saw yourself being taken by a stranger, your mouth hung open in shock. Head bobbing quickly from his pace you shuttered your eyes to the image, you were too afraid it might stain on your memory.

His hand glided from your neck to your shoulder gripping you there as he fucked you against the sink. It doesn’t take much. Waves of bliss and the want to cum flooded to your cunt.

“There’s a good girl.” he moaned. “’Cum for me, doll.”

And you did. The crippling orgasm buckled your legs as he grabbed around your waist. He slipped from your body as the ache of it fulfilled your need. It happened fast. The clearing of your daze, the want in your body it started to fade so quickly. But you still felt odd, dazed and unfocused.

“What happened to me…,” you mumbled, the question was interrupted by the sounds of feet scurrying past the door. You felt his body grow rigid, his hold on you tightened.

A burst of white light filled the room illuminating the dirt and grime. Thunder rose once again but a boom from outside the window shattered it blowing glass all over you and Bucky.

“Stay here, find some new clothes.”

He leaned you against the sink. Bucky left the room before you could say another world leaving you there in the after-effects. The whole house sounded like a drum. Thumping footfalls, the beating of slamming doors echoed through the house. You didn’t change. Instead, you followed him outside the bathroom despite what he told you to do. The beat of the music you didn’t notice before drew you in. You took a left, feeling your way through the even shorter hall to a set of stairs. The melody, the beat it was in your ears, and moving across your skin. The stairs creaked under your weight, the shabby house with shaky foundations didn’t absorb your movements.

At the top of the stairs, a few feet beyond a green light cast an eerie glow on to the three women standing there. Undulating to the music. One with brown short hair, another with long blond strands, and the furthest shook her ass while she pulled off a cigarette had waist-length black hair. Three servants of sorts, you assumed they are Ronin’s relief, the bodies he used at the end of the day. The blond was thin, stringy hair and gaunt cheeks, dark shadows for eyes focused toward you.

“I wouldn’t come up here. Ronin’s locked us out.” She said, licked her lips ground her ass on the one with brown hair. “You don’t want him to catch you up here baby.”

You immediately turned around and headed back down the stairs. This time you did mean to change. You returned to the bathroom, but you heard motions and yelling that sounded like it was on the other side of the broken window. Another flash of light and something else like whooshing. Stepping over bits of glass you peered out the window. A frantic sounding whirl hit your ears, the sounds of faint yelling mixed in with it. But there, through the shaking trees, the wind, and the rain you see a man surrounded by blue light. Another blinding flash and you turned away to protect your eyes. By the time you jerked your eyes back to the scene, he was gone.

You grabbed your bag and flung the door open. You were still too high for this. Dizzy, and feeling sick the stirring in the house was still ongoing. People ran out the front door, others hid but you walked right back the way you entered the house. Except for this time, near the front door was a room with a door to the back of the house. It was a laundry room, with a large sink directly across from the door and a washer and dryer against the furthest wall. It was brightly lit by a single bulb swinging from a thin cord it showcased the mold growing in the corners.

Bucky slowly opened the screened door, his hair was dirty, wet again when he turned to look at you just as you entered the small room. The wobbly feeling was back and the moment appeared to move in slow motion. Your heart hammered hard in your chest, your awareness of the situation and the drugs in your blood caused a boost in anxiety. But he didn’t give you a second glance seemingly nonplused by the three bloody thick streaks down his chest.

“What—what’s going on? The—“ you tried to think of the word from the drug still coursing through you. “The lights…what was it?”

You thought he was hurt, very badly. Who knew what had occurred out there so you immediately walked to him, your eyes searching his body for the origin of the wound. He pushed you back with his left arm, and then he peeled his shirt off.

Your eyes fell back to the door, you wonder what hell laid behind it. You couldn’t see through the grimy screen. Bucky turned on the facet, bringing your focus back as he splashed a few handfuls of water over his face, neck, and chest. He grabbed a towel wiped his face then threw it back where he found it.

Once again you stared at him. Captivated by the light gliding into shadows along his metal arm and on to his lean muscular body. “Cool it,” said Bucky, your eyes still staring at him he moved away toward the back door.

But it flew open and in walked an equally tall broad-shouldered man dressed in a thick navy colored raincoat. Dark wheat blond hair, damp from the rain stuck to his temples. His sharp jaw covered by a thick beard matched the color of his hair and with a pair of steely blue eyes landed on you. The slightest of smiles began to curl at the corners of his mouth.

It was Steve Rogers. You recognized him even with the facial hair. He was America’s Captain.

The government police was here. Flashing red and blue lights strobed in from around his form. Unsettled, and certainly not wanting to get in deeper you began to retreat from the room.

But you felt a hand, strong and it wrap around your arm. “Where you going?” said a deep voice, you turned clenching your teeth as you tried to loosen the grip with your hand. The man too grinned down at you, his black swirly short beard lined the smile. His smooth skin was moist, shiny that matched the glimmer in his eye.

"Sam, get a print on her," ordered Steve. Your head jerked back toward him and felt your heart skip a beat at the slight smile still on his lips.

“She’s clean, I already ran her. She’s the carrier.” Said Bucky, your eyes moved to him. Shocked your mouth gaped at the notion. You weren’t a mule or anything of the sorts. Steve nodded, slowly jerked his head back to gesture to bring you in closer.

"She doesn't look right." said Sam and stepped up to Steve to get a better look at you.

Bucky grabbed a shirt from the stack near him. “Ya. Ronin fucking dusted her.” He said as pulled it on.

Steve slightly tilted his head as his eyes glided down to your chest. “How’d that turn out?” he asked as a heaviness settled in your body. Your eyes, wide and teary shifted to Bucky standing just behind Steve.

“She’ll be over it soon.” said Bucky.

Steve sighed, his hands hooked into his belt while still regarding you with the weighty glare. “Even so, we should get some evidence. Maybe get her cleaned up too.”

“No..I’m fine.” You insisted, jerked again but the man’s grip on you didn’t budge.

"Hey, it's okay," said Steve, his hands drifted from his belt to cup your face even though you shook away. "Hey..we're the good guys."

Your vision blurred as he drew in closer. His hands, cold and damp made your skin crawl when he started caressing your face.

“I think someone else might have got to you first though.” He said curtly bringing his thumb to your lips as he tried to force you to suck but you bit back.

“Damn shame. It’s rare to see a clean woman in this area.” said Sam callously and squeezed your arm harder. “But I bet we can make an exception.”

“No. Take your hands off her.” Bucky finally stepped in and again he pulled you out of imminent danger. He casually walked between you and Steve, his hand waved away the man named Sam away.

“We don’t have time for whatever this, Rogers.” A woman’s voice rose up above the beginnings of Steve’s reply. He moved aside and she stepped into the small space. Limp short brown hair tucked behind her ears with ruby red lips she surveyed with large brown eyes at the men and then finally to you.

“Is that all you have to wear?” she asked you, aware and possibly incensed to what she walked in upon she glared up at Steve.

“Peg. I doubt one of _them_ have anything-“

“I’ve got my bag.” You pointed behind you, where you left the bag.

“Go with her Carter.” Ordered Steve and Peg ushered you passed Bucky to the living room.

“Get dressed here and hurry up.” Her light English accent clipped off, though short she sounded dedicated to her orders.

But you could hear the men still talking. You tore off the top replaced it with a thin sweater.

“It’s a fucking mess back there Barnes.” said Steve.

Your eyes cut back to the woman, she was watching you as the skirt slid down to your ankles. Quickly you stepped into a pair of jeans, your socks that were surprisingly still dry then your running shoes.

“I didn’t do it. Relax,“ said Bucky.

“So it’s not like Las Vegas, Right?” asked the man who held you.

“No. I did cut him because he threatened her. That other shit, I didn’t do that.” said Bucky.

“Well, fuckin’ Ronin’s brains and guts are spread all over that yard.’ said Steve. “The libbys will be here soon, if they aren’t already.” he added.

A commotion, a loud group of voices erupted from the door. Steve followed by Sam and then Bucky ran through it. The woman, Peg, grabbed your arm as you held your bag under your other arm. She kicked the door back and shoved you through it to a scene right out of the lore of the land. A few government black SWAT geared up officers, looking every bit like the black beetles of the stories you had heard. One of them had a woman, her light red hair stuck to her face. She was begging and crying as the man threw her at Steve’s boots.

"Fuck you! I’m not a spy!” she yelled, she spat at his boots.

It was Tammie.

“I found this lurking by the sheds.” The officer pointed at the hunched over woman on the ground who dared not to look up.

“I have my papers! See!” Tammie started to dig in her pockets, the SWAT raised their guns. And Steve, large and imposing stepped up to her towering over her thin frame. “WHOA!” shouted the officer. Tammie stopped, held her hands up with the papers at her fingertips.

Steve snatched it unfolded and read it, and then tossed the flimsy paper back at her. It fell over her head and to the ground.

“Shoot her.” Ordered Steve.

“No!” you ripped out of Peg’s hold and ran toward her. Flashes of the old man from the bus rolled around in your thoughts and in your heart as you ran for Tammie. Bucky grabbed you by the arm stopping you so fast your feet slipped in the mud and you fell to the ground.

Shaking terribly from the sandy mud you watched Bucky continue to walk toward Tammie. He lifted the pistol aimed. And then Tammie’s head snapped back. The shot rang in your ears.

Shock, you covered your mouth to push down the scream. You are in total disbelief as your eyes pulled from Tammie’s still kneeling slumped form back up to Bucky.

The man who had saved you twice tonight lowered his gun. You had heard the stories of outlier justice. Entire families slaughtered, the innocent accused and denied a trial then executed on sight.

You just got your first taste of it.

Bucky was a killer.


	3. Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get caught in the fray.

Your feet felt heavy. Matter of fact so did your body. And as you picked yourself up from the mud that stuck between your fingers, the weight of an elephant now sat on your chest. You stared at Tammie. Wide blank eyes floated over the position of her knees, the delicate way her fingertips folded down over her palms, and to the bullet hole.

Ghastly. You shut your eyes, the bile in your stomach flipped. A wave of nausea preceded your need to retreat as you took an unstable step back toward the house. Again, another gurgle from the pit of upset sent you turning and clasping at your knees in a wretched gag.

“You killed her.” You spoke softly because the pain in your voice matched the sharp stab in your chest. “You fucking killed her.” you rasped.

You turned your head back in the direction of Tammie. She was still there a few feet away from you, her body lying there, unattended like a pile of garbage. Tears, giant warm tears fell from your eyes as you turned back to the ground.

“Hey.” Said Steve. He was over your hunched form, his large hands rubbed over your spine to your shoulder forcing you to stand. 

Your eyes darted to the slamming back door Peggy had stepped out of. Beyond that, passed the edge of the house laid darkness, but in it, hope that it wasn’t too late to run. If you could get away.

But Steve enticed you back in. Through your worry, the kind pitch of his voice broke through your concentration.

“She wasn’t a good person,” said Steve smoothly. He stroked your damp curls from your face, his fingers hooked under your chin tilting up to face him. “No tears for traitors. Spies don’t have rights. Okay? She was better off dead with all the damage she could have done.”

You couldn’t take your eyes off of Steve. Nor could you ignore the bare tenderness of his eyes. The dedication, the loyalty to his words almost surprised you as much as Tammie’s execution.

“You’re a good citizen. ‘Want to stay that way don’t you?” He asked though it came out broken like he didn’t quite believe his own words.

He was far too familiar with you. Like he was starved for attention, for touch, and saw no worry in expressing it with you. Perhaps he too was far more damaged than even he accepted. Suddenly, and without prompting on your part, Steve swept his hand over your cheek again. This time more warmly he gazed into your eyes as his fingers curled under your jaw, his thumb sweeping over your lips, your chin. Like that of an old boyfriend, a lost love, or as a man simply enraptured with your presence.

The wave of sickness only turned into knots. You brushed Steve’s thumb off your lips, his fingers away from your jaw shaking his touch and his intentions away. Muddy, sloppy footfalls turned your eyes toward the approaching man. To Bucky, eyes raged filled and hostile he strode up to you bypassed Steve and wedged himself in front of you.

“So where’s the clip?” Bucky huffed toward you, his breaths were loud, noisy as he spoke. You shrugged, and involuntary act given the fact you had no idea what he was talking about. Confusion creasing your features, Bucky stepped closer, forced you to step back against his advances until you hit the fading siding of the house.

“You’re from Texas?” he asked, the frustration in his tone only made you want to run for it all the more. “What’s left of it, anyway. I know you were chosen to carry the clip.” He said accusingly, grabbed your shoulder and squeezed. “Come’ on don’t tell me you were left in the dark on this.” He said through clenched teeth.

He was hurting you. The vice on your arm clamped down causing you to bend slightly and hold the wall. “I lost my café..everything,“ you said tearfully, wincing as he dug in further. "I was selected to come here, to find employment. My town depends on the stamps I’ll make…” you whined, unable to finish passed the pain.

“Liar.” Bucky whipped his metal hand to your neck and yanked you forward from the wall into his face. “I’ve been following you since Amarillo. I saw the god damn drop with my own eyes.”

Bucky brought his other hand to your neck. Like a twig, he stretched his hands over the two pulse points under your hot, sweaty skin. You scraped at his wrists at first, but soon fear stopped you as he began to constrict.

“I never…” You tried to speak, but the fear carried you through the terror and willed you to give him an answer. “I never left my bag!” you shouted through the closing clamp.

The rain started again. Sheets of it came pouring down drowning the tears streaming down your face. You stared at Bucky, peered into the depths of his black pupil hoping to god he would believe you. But he didn’t stop. Your vision began to blur, his outline fuzzed as he closed off the precious air you needed to live.

“Alright.” Steve stepped up, his head dipped into your vision from the side but he looked directly at Bucky. “Let go.” He ordered.

Bucky tore his hands away. Coughing and sputtering against the fresh air hitting your lungs, your fingers held the sore muscles of your neck. Your eyes were still wholly fixed on him despite Steve’s presence. Rain flowed over Bucky’s face as he gave you another rigid glare. He leaned over grabbed up your bag turned it over spilling the contents on to the ground. You watched him kick over your things with a boot, some of them stuck into the mud.

Passed the pelting rain, the beating of your heart, the sounds of drones buzzed over your head. And then all at once, each sound was drowned out by a hundred drum beats all knocking together in a step by step rhythm that rumbled the ground beneath you.

Bars of rain at first hid them, though their spectral footfalls made their presence known. They slowly emerged from the dark and drew closer to the house the pitiful shine of a security light showed them for who they were. Troops, the infamous beetles, about a dozen shiny armored government soldiers entered the small yard.

“It’s not here.” He growled. Your eyes fell to the ground in time to see Bucky dropped the bag on top of your things. Anxious and still quite shaken you quickly picked up your stuff glancing ever so often the troops. You closed the lip of your bag, the rain had gotten to most of it but at least it was a bit more protected. Slinging the strap back across your chest you stood up, your eyes locked in on the man approaching Steve.

“N’Jadaka, you’re late.” Yelled Steve. “Sam, scope out the western edge.” He then ordered the man, who had held you in the house.

Bucky grabbed your arm, pulled you along as he walked next to Steve. In the pale light, your eyes couldn’t help but look down at Tammie’s body as you passed her. The yank on your arm reminded you to keep up, so you concentrated on the path before you and tried to forget she was merely a few feet behind. Focused on what was to come you looked at the man approaching Steve. You recognized this man, N’Jadaka, the one who sat next to you on the bus. His skin the color of shimmering nightfall, rain pooled in drops and glistened down his face in the faint light. He was still in the thin oversized black jacket, hiding what you suspected a bulky strong frame. The gold sleek necklace, poking outside the zipper, glimmered as rain struck it. Chest up, chin out the man addressed Steve.

“We don’t have time for this shit.” The tone of his voice ruthless, he waved his hand toward Tammie’s dead body. “They’re rallying back there on the other side of the mall. We gotta move,“ announced N’Jadaka.

“They aren’t going to bomb their own people.” Said Sam, but as you watched him he held a finger on a pair of utility goggles, his head turning with whatever he was analyzing through them. Bucky’s hand dropped from you, but still near, he watched you ever so often from the corner of his eye.

“What people?” argued N’Jadaka. “Use that little birdie you like to flaunt. Check the thermo. There ain’t shit here but us.”

Sam goes quiet, so does the rain, a bit. The sprinkles fall over their forms as your eyes rock between Steve, Bucky and Sam. Unsure of what was to come, you gazed into the dark spots between the soldiers; you strained your eyes searching for the _bad guys_.

“There’s interference.” Sam took a step away still studying the input. Your eyes slid to him as he turned back to the group. There was a thump, followed by a compressed roar in the distance. Loud, like the sonic boom of a jet breaking the sound barrier. You stepped away, ready to run as great metal wings unfolded from behind Sam, he shouted. “Fuck. We have incoming-“

The concussion knocked you across the group into Steve, he reacted quicker, and more focused he held you as the force blasted the two of you forward. No time to feel, your body locked down, numbed your extremities to the thud against the metal door of an old truck. Steve took most of it. But not your head, the rolling stream of warmth etched down your face as you hit the muddy ground.

He was on top of you. Your eyes stared blankly at Steve, his face scrunched in determination stared back down at you. He shielded you. He protected you and pushed you to roll over as another blast sent shards toward you.

When it was over your ears buzzed, popped into a surreal soft warping that became the backdrop of the aftermath. Soft thumping hailed down on you like balls of ice. But it wasn’t weather, just pieces of the house you had been inside of only a few minutes ago. Steve stood, you felt his absence, his lack of shelter immediately. You continued to huddle, gripped the step rail of the truck as bits of splintered wood landed all around.

There wasn’t much to you at this moment. You didn’t think of the next or what had come before. You did what came naturally in fear, your focus became narrowed on survival. But murmurs and deep grumbling voices began to seep in through the muffle. And when it cleared the only sound you heard was Bucky. His voice, rough and commanding screamed at you to get up. But you did not move, only stared underneath at the belly of the truck you were currently trying to squeeze your body under.

Bucky tugged hard on your wrist, flipping you to your back. He pulled you up from the ground, your bag swung behind choking you with its canvas threads. He tucked you in near his torso, turned his body using his metal arm to take the bullets whizzing by your ear, your body.

And as quick as the gunfire began it stopped. The tightness in your chest was still ever-present and just as oppressive as you tried to catch your breath. Your eyes, quick to find the next threat, landed on a few military trucks rolling into the area crowding it further. Their headlights flooded it in halogen white enough for you to get a sense of the damage. Where the house once stood was blown out now with only the frame barely standing, laid in a smoldering fiery mess. But like the last few hours, there wasn’t time to catch your breath. Bucky’s hand was on your back, pushing you once again bringing you back into the fray.

Geared men poured out of the trucks, they gathered with the dozen that was already there a few joined the leader at his flank.

“Cap, the drones have been disabled!” shouted an officer running ahead of the pack toward a stack of blackened boards lying near Tammie’s body. “Back-up won’t be here for another half hour!”

The man’s voice was the only sound now aside from your light footsteps. Eerie. Even the wind, the rain had silenced as the soft ebony sky peeked through the heavy clouds. This couldn’t be real. The beginning of your day was far from boring, but now as the quiet intruded upon your thoughts it had you questioning the ending. Would you even see the end?

Bucky pushed you near the broken pile of wood. You wiped at your face, blinked several times to clear the blood and god knows what from your eyes. Just as Steve, now with his jacket off the slick black combat suit jogged up near Bucky. Sam flew in landed with a thud next to N’Jadka who wore a suit of his own. Black, the gold in his necklace now threaded through the thick black material of his sleek armor. His face was bare, thick brows drew in as he surveyed behind you at the remains of the house. 

Illuminated by nothing but those military truck lights you too took in the scene. You were in deep now. Surrounded by government military, the supers and now accused of being a mule your stomach flipped again.

“Why am I still here?” You blurted out into their conversation. Your eyes turned to Steve a few feet at your right. He placed his thumbs in his belt looked you over before returning to Sam.

“WHY AM I HERE!” you shouted and tried not to shake. Steve stopped talking, slowly he stepped up in front as you continued. “I have nothing of value.” The pleading in your voice did nothing to soften his gaze. “I just followed Tammie! I was hungry…I didn’t-“ you started to fall apart, right there, tears started up again as you turned to Steve and then Bucky who still had a steady hand on your back.

“You dumped my shit on the ground. There’s nothing!” You stepped away from Bucky, pointed at him as you gripped the sling on your bag. “Amarillo? I don’t know what you’re talking about?” You rounded back to Steve, who watched you calmly, it unnerved you the level of composure he had in his gaze, so you tampered your tone. “I won’t say anything about what I saw tonight. Just release me!” you bargained.

His brow arched. “What did you see tonight?” You blinked. Unsure how to answer you stayed quiet, you watched him. “Because you make it sound like there was something amiss, not right about my actions or his.”

You shook your head. You remembered painfully that Tammie’s body was just over your shoulder. “The way I see it. And the official government statement about your involvement would be subterfuge. A spy.” Steve grabbed your wrist you jerked back on it. “A fucking traitor.”

“No—no I didn’t mean-“ you fumbled over your words.

“Still see your balls deep, Rogers.” A voice behind you. Sharp, and resounding came up above the roar in your head. Steve yanked you toward Bucky who sort of caught you though still let you stumble into the planks to his right as he rounded toward the voice.

The red metal, iron, barely made a sound as Tony Stark strode up in his signature suit. You were close and upfront, near enough to see the seams gliding along between the strong iron plates. Fucking Iron Man himself. The amount of danger you were in felt beyond you somehow. These people had collapsed entire cities. Both outside your body and caught in the moment you kept a cool head despite the astounding anxiety rushing through you.

“Don’t you ever think for yourself?” asked Tony, his expressionless mask pulled away to reviled a smirk under his thin mustache. “I tell ya, man, you’re the last person I thought would be on the shit side.“ He added.

"And you’re not?” Questioned Steve, though his voice was still in that calm pitch you were fast becoming accustomed to but his stance said otherwise. “I thought you wanted to fight for the little man. Help out where you could. But you just did what you always do. In it for yourself. But at least you’re consistent.” Said Steve.

“There you go. Thinking again. Besides, they had a great pitch. Why not?”

A subtle movement, a slow inching as Bucky reached for the gun on his hip drew your eye to him momentarily.

“Say we call the whole thing off if you hand over Barnes right now?” said Tony. “Word on the ground is he’s back to his murdering ways. Where’s Clint?”

A shift occurred. You felt it. The heighten tension sizzled and buzzed across the skin of your back up to your neck.

"He didn’t kill him and he didn’t kill her either,” said Steve.

“Bullshit.” Tony bit off.

“Still not goin’ to happen.” Said Steve.

“Well, he murdered my wife.” The iron mask reappeared. “And I don’t give a shit what you think happened.”

You were pushed into the stack of wood straight on your back. In a snap, beams of light shot out over your vision igniting the velvety black sky in plasma white streaks. You scrambled after that. Around the stack, you dragged your bag around and landed on something softer, more firm than the mud but still more forgiving.

A blast to the stack blew more pieces of wood onto you as you fell off and on to the mud. On your belly, you looked through what was left of the barrier. Steve and Bucky were on Tony but he wasn’t defenseless. Shots rang out from the troops a few hit the stack shuttering your head away from it. And then, through the slanted halogen lights from the trucks and the beams of light from Tony, you saw her. Tammie’s eyes were still open, staring blankly at you.

You tried not to scream but it came out anyway, struggling to get out around the stuttering breaths you tried to suck in. You stared back at her, glancing anywhere on her body other than her eyes. You cupped your mouth, slowly looked back through the cracks in the planks they were still fighting. Guttural yells drowned out your weeping and you pulled your eyes back to Tammie.

Timidly, you reached out a few dirty fingers to her face, pushed a few strands out of her eyes and with your fingertips shut the lids. You resisted the gag in your throat. Your eyes lingered down her unnatural pose. Wedged in the mud and her pale skin a circlet of metal poked out. Your eyes whipped up to her lifeless face. Maybe she was a spy. Or something else.

You reached in tugged it out. In the light it shone, though black with bumpy ridges parts of it seemed not wholly Earth-based. Another blast erupted far too near, the force of it had you ducking down into your bag. You pocketed the metal, shoved it deep into your bag as you looked again through the slats.

The fighting moved off behind the ruins of the house. It was motionless where you were. Shivering you got to your knees, looked again this time just over a few planks there was nothing there but the trucks. Balloons of fire bloomed into the sky. You looked in the opposite direction. Maybe you could circle back to the mall, completely bypass all of this fighting.

Fuck it. You could take the chance. It was better than the alternative.

You dashed from the wood stack, away from Tammie’s body toward the next house across the small yard. You slipped in between two trailers and just kept taking rights every five trailers. In your mind you could see yourself, with every turn, making your way back toward the mall, back to safety.

You felt hunted. Though you knew Tony Stark was giving them all the attention they could handle. You couldn’t shake the feeling of being followed. Anxiety. Yes, that was it.

Pounding the mud you ran, leg-burning strides but you did it anyway. You held the bag to your body making it easier to be quicker. The last house, you could see the spiked roof, was coming up. The one where you would hang that right in your desire to return to the mall.

It was funny. The smell, the feeling. The static cling in the air made your skin crawl, you could feel the hair on your arms rise. The fragrance of burning, what kind of burning you didn’t know. It just smelled acrid, strange.

A blue flash from above the roof of the trailer you were nearest ripped through the black sky. The blazing light struck the house you were headed toward, it busted the walls into flames blasted wood, glass, and puffs of insulation. Quick to course correct you turned back around, ran the length of the trailer and ran to the left continuing your slow circle of the shantytown.

To your left, through a gap in a couple of trailers, you could see the flames and shadows of smoke billowing from the remains but soon lost sight of it. You just ran. Hooked another left, ran straight again making your way around the burning building but still turned another right to get back on your path.

The thunder was back and in the distance, you could still hear the shooting, pops of shots and every so often back in the direction you had run from a burning glow would ignite the sky. It only pushed you on. Though you struggled to breathe, the catch in your side was beginning to feel like a tear in your ribs. But you didn’t stop, even as you felt your body give in to the fatigue, you refused.

You tried to map out the path you took. Plotting another turn you imaged that you were coming closer to the mall. You hoped. Though above you clouds gathered unnaturally quick, above the roofs you saw the sudden shift of it and felt it in the air. You didn’t want to think about it. You just wanted to be free of all this.

Sucking in large batches of air searing your throat making it raw to even draw a breath you tried to keep a clear head. But you were slower now, but still you wobbly turned made that right and hit a wall.

You bounced off the hardness of it but in the dark, it appeared to grab back. It pulled you by the wrist, snatching you off your feet and dragged you into the black.

Lightening cracked between the clouds above you, brilliant and more closely than you could have imaged flashed just behind the figure. He was shaped like a brick. Felt as unforgiving as one too. Another jagged spark illuminated long wild yellow locks and a crimson cape just in front of you. Standing tall between the two trailers a man pulled you against your will toward him.

Staring into the depths of what could have been hell. Lightning cracked again, the man’s face became apparent.

“All this running” he said amused, _thrilled_ that you were caught. A lofty chuckle filtered into the dark afterwards that ran your blood cold. “And for what?” Your head dipped as a large hand pressed against your scalp grabbing your wet hair by the roots and then snapped your head back. 

“You weren’t trying to escape now were you?” asked Thor.


	4. Red Ribbons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You meet back up with Bucky and Steve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: death, violence, angst, blood, non-con/dubious consent

Thor tugged at the back of your head.

The rain poured in sheets. You were drenched, the cold sharpness soaked into your skin. Your lashes were heavy, it collected there, running down your face like tears. You were shaking hard. Your bones felt like they rattled too. Stiff fingers wrapped around Thor’s thick wrist, they slipped with the grip. You tried anyway. Clawing like a cat you held on to him just as he latched to you.

Lightening, bold and foreboding, flashed above the tops of the trailers drowning the shadows of his face in electric blue. Inside, you told yourself that you were stronger than this moment. Stubborn, that even in the face of what certainly could be your end, you could survive it. But your breaths came short with the spike of in blood pressure. The fear, nesting in your gut, refused you the ability to draw it in fully. The little that did make it into your senses became seared into your nose. He smelled of the strange scent, the pungent burned air caught in the wind whirled around you.

Thor bent your head back further baring the smooth column of your neck to him you had no choice but to lift your eyes to the dark sky.

You were in trouble.

It wasn’t possible to piece together the ways your mind had just split from the terror. The God of Thunder had you now. His body count was higher than the plague.

“I should snap your neck.” He said, pulling on the already taut muscles. “Pitiful.” he sneered.

“Please, I _surrender_..” You whispered through trembling lips your eyes glued to the sky. You did as you were instructed too. Remembering fully the words of the council within the few seconds where your neck started to pop. If you were to ever come in contact with the supers, give in and you might not catch a deadly beating. It wasn’t submission, you convinced yourself, just quick thinking.

The hand on your wrist soon found a new home around your neck. He twisted you around against his chest. Your feet slid, scraped in the mud trying desperately to stay upright. Thor didn’t care, he walked you to the nearest trailer wall slammed you upon it face first. The sand stuck on it, the chipping paint, now wet from the rain, poured into your eyes, your mouth.

He pulled both of your wrists behind your back. The click of cuffs sank your fear further. You were caught, there would be no escape. A flashpoint of heat began when Thor’s fingers touched your skin, then his cool palms glided up your top. Suddenly his breath was there, on your neck, his body pushing in on you. And you realized quickly what this was.

“Mortal life….just a waste of air.” He mumbled against your ear. You shivered under his touch, felt the sick ball of a forming gag in your chest. “Could be worth something, for once in your useless life.”

You turned your head to the other side in an attempt to clear him. It didn’t stop him. Cool lips hovered somewhere over the nape of your neck. It only set up the opportunity to snap your head back. Sharp and quick, you whipped your head back, cracking him in the nose.

Thor did not step back. He did pause. The weight of his silence slowly began to creep up your spine.

Thunder crashed above you. “You’ll pay for that,” he swore.

He threw you. Tossed you like a piece of siding, you landed hard on the side of your hip, the force of it rolled you through the mud on to your face. Both half on your bag and the ground you shifted your weight to roll over. In the dark, in the black of it, you could still make out his boxy framed silhouette from the flashes.

“We found them!” shouted another voice. You still couldn’t see enough to truly orient yourself. You laid there, rain poured into your wide eyes waiting for Thor to fulfill his promise. But he only pulled you up from the ground shoved you back out of the space between the trailers. Dizzy and sick to your stomach you swayed as you fell into a group of armored soldiers.

You couldn’t lie to yourself if you said you were grateful. Out of Thor’s grasp, anything else seemed better.

* * *

Thor’s cold hands settled roughly on both sides of your arms. The wickedness in his eye was something to be avoided. So you stared straight at the ground. Yanking you from the soldiers he walked you toward Steve, Sam, and Bucky waiting by an aircraft. Soaking wet, muddy from your face to your shoes he leaned over you. “Disgusting little parasite.” He sneered in near from your left and shoved you toward them.

“She’s a mess.” Said Sam. “What the hell happened?”

Out of the corner of your eye, Thor’s hand gestured at you. “She likes to fight back,” he said with a shrug.

“Load her up.” Steve’s voice was tight, ordered.

You trudged up the ram into their jet, airplane, whatever it was, Sam nudged you on making sure not to touch you too much. He uncuffed you. Sore and with streaking pain shooting down your shoulders you tried to roll them, anything to move the ache around. Sam once again nudged you. Collapsing into the thin bench Sam lifted a finger into the air as if to tell you to raise your wrists. You did it. You did anything that would make it easier for you to remain living. With one last look out the open gape of this jet, Bucky was the last to walk up the ramp. Beyond him flames, then bursts of explosions shattered into the night sky.

They had laid waste. All the stories were true. And to think, this morning when you woke up on that bus all of this was just another tale, the lore of the war-torn land. But it wasn’t.

They were the _bad guys_.

* * *

Spread out to the east and south. The brunt of the military had holed up fifty miles west from the settlement. They had commandeered a motel in a no-name town. Bucky had shoved you into this room told you to wash up. But not before he tore your clothes off of you. He shredded them from your body, left more bruises over your chest while he ripped off your bra.

That was a few hours ago. It was still dark out. Although, you could not have been sure how long it truly had been. _What was the time_? You didn’t even feel tired. Sore, and slightly hungry but you were so far from being comfortable enough to rest.

A single sad lamp shone a weak cast of light into the small room. A bed, a broken down chipping dresser and a table with two chairs beside the curtained window completed the shitty room. You had paced the length of it several times. You mulled over in your mind how this day began to the moment you stood in this patch of Nevada. If only you had stayed at the mall.

Now, you kept your eyes on the mirror and sat on the hard mattress across from it. Another person all together you pinned your attention on the reflection. Cleanly washed you kept the sheet of the bed around your body. You sat cocooned in the stale sheets, stared blankly at the small oval mirror mounted on top of the shotty dresser. They hadn’t given you anything more to wear. You were able to at least treat your hair from what you stuck in the bag. So you managed to pulled it back well enough out of your face. A desperate cling for normalcy you imagined. Though as far as clothes were concerned what was in the bag was far from wearable. Not after Bucky had upturned it.

You continued to wait. For what you did not know. But you knew the fear in you that had become familiar now was back. Anticipation? More like scared and the expectation of what was to come once they returned kept you still.

The creak of the door opening pulled your attention toward it.

It was Bucky. His long chestnut-colored hair pushed back behind his ears. The stubble of his beard made the sharpness of his jaw all the more prominent.

The hero stepped into the room, slammed the door shut behind him. His pupils expanded in the half-light, he raked over the sheet stretched around your shoulders and then to your face.

He never stopped looking at you when he removed the faded stained shirt leaving him bare-chested.

Heat rose immediately into your chest as you turned, dropped your eyes to the dingy carpet. You dug your toes into it and hoped he would stop looking at you like that.

“He’s coming,” Bucky said softly. He always seemed so much more different than his counterpart. No doubt he was brutal, but when he spoke to you when it was just the two of you. He was gentle. But the anxious feeling was back regardless of his tender manner. And it hit harder now more than ever. “Steve’s going to want information.”

You turned back toward him. He was closer now just on the opposite corner of the bed.

“I don’t know anything.” You pleaded, held the sheet tighter.

“That’s hard to believe. You were right in the middle of that house. It puts you at the scene.” Said Bucky, removing his gloves he tossed them on the table, adding them to the stack of empty styrofoam cups, stray papers.

He crossed his fingers behind his head. He stretched as he sighed. The seemingly non-aggressive act still stirred fear. He was so relaxed as he spoke. “I think that makes you fully aware of what was going on. Even if you don’t think so.”

You shook your head and stood up. Bucky dropped his arms, rolled his shoulders as he stepped closer. He made it around the bed before you could take one step back. And he was on you. Both of his hands were on your shoulders. Not squeezing as you would have anticipated, but softly he held you there in front of him.

“If you don’t speak up when you are told there will be punishment.” He whispered. “It’s goin’ to be hard on you…but I can make it easy. Okay? Make you like it too.”

You suddenly realized. That Bucky Barnes was trying to save you again. Though with each word it became agonizingly clear what Captain America had in store for you.

You started to cry.

“Bucky, I know nothing.” You said through tears. “I was just in the wrong place…I came here for my town. They needed commodities…”

“Whatever you do.” Bucky wiped at your tears. His thumbs roughly spread them away from your cheeks. “Don’t do that. Don’t cry. It only makes him want it more.”

Your eyes widened. You could feel the stretch in your face from a sickening shock of his comment.

“I’ve seen spies, how they act, and how they move around in this world. You aren’t that.” He gave your face one last squeeze.

“But you need to tell us what you have seen. _Everything_ -.”

The door opened again.

“You’re not starting without me again are ya pal?” asked Steve in that hallowed out chipper tone.

Your eyes drifted from Bucky as he stepped back and turned toward Steve.

“You know, I enjoy a rough start.” He said with a smile. Brightly he looked between Bucky and you as he came further into the room. He paused to peeled of his kevlar jacket. Bucky grabbed you through the sheet bringing you closer to the bed.

“No..” you twisted back in the direction of the bathroom forcing Bucky to snake his metal arm around your neck.

He whipped you back around, you struggled to catch your breath and hold on to the sheet at the same time.

“I always thought spies were smarter.” He chided as he removed his boots. “But the longer I’m near you the more I think you just might not be.”

Steve tugged at his utility shirt, pulled it over his head and threw it on top of his jacket.

“At this point, I don’t really care. I just know that you have more to tell me.”

A few steps and he was standing in front of you. He gazed at you with a small beginning of a grin at the corner of his mouth. His hands fell in front of his pants as he unbuttoned them, slipped them down to the floor while never taking his eyes off you.

You tried to move again but Bucky held you there. So you shut your eyes. Hoped like hell to never see Captain America like this again.

Something pulled at the sheet. Your eyes flew open just as he yanked it away. “Don’t be shy.” He lightly chuckled.

“Stop..” you said through the hold of Bucky’s metal arm. “I’ll tell you anything…”

“Well, I don’t want just anything.” Said Steve, he licked his lips just as his hand dipped between your thighs. “I want everything you’ve seen.”

You balled your fist up and struck him in the face. He didn’t flinch. And as Bucky tucked your other arm around your back he squeezed harder on your neck. The breath you so desperately needed drifted from you. The vice had you scratching at his metal arm for mercy.

You could still feel Steve’s fingers now gliding lower he rubbed against your slit. “She’s already a bit wet Bucky. Damn. Good work, pal.”

Steve’s fingers pushed up inside you as his eyes met yours. He smiled as he forced you to accept one, and then two. “Go easy on her Buck. I want a lively body this time…”

And then Steve’s eyes burst into delight. He pulled his fingers from within you and retreated to the table. “I found this. I thought it would be useful.” Said Steve as he turned around and wiggled it in the air. “Sorta wanted to use it on Peg…but I really want to see this girl shine.” And he pointed at you.

“No..no!” you tried to shout. He drew near, the purple powder became all too familiar.

Steve grabbed your other hand. “Squeeze her tighter.”

On command, Bucky tightened. A minute passed when you started to gulp for air. Your eyes stared at Steve, a grin slowly turned into a smile as he held the baggy open. He hovered it over your face. Painfully, you stared at it with dancing blurry stars darting into your vision.

“Okay. Let her breath.”

And Bucky released just as Steve dumped the powder over your nose, your mouth as you gasped. Like sand stuck in your toes, the purple _dust_ clung to the tender creases of your throat. Coughing and sputtering you took it deep into your lungs, your sinuses.

Bucky released you. Grabbing at your neck, your chest anything that would make the burning stop you walked to the bed. Your hands grabbed at the bare mattress. Bent over in a coughing fit you didn’t feel Steve until he entered you.

He stretched you. Not able to fully take him in he pulled out. Steve grabbed you up by the back of your head and flipped you over on to the bare dirty bed. The bed dipped around you as his knees depressed the mattress as he climbed on top of you.

Blue, neon cobalt ringed his eyes. It was starting. But this time the effects were much stronger. You wiped at your face tried to regain a merciful hold on your emotions. But already, it felt tight in your groin. That dull wanting need settled in your belly.

He pressed his warm body over the top of your even hotter torso. He leaned in, forcing you to take most of his weight. “You’re going to want this bad in a minute..” Steve’s lips licked at your earlobe as he held your wrists to your head.

Your last stand was crumbling.

The shudder he drew from you felt almost cosmic. Dipped into the flow of the threads of the universe, your senses came alive. This felt different than before. His sweat wafted into your nose, it made you wet. Steve plucked at your clit the stroke almost brought you to an orgasm. Chuckling, the vibrations from it rolled over your body releasing every inhibition you desperately held on to. His breath hit every hair on your neck as he laid kisses and returned his hand to your wrist. He pushed the tip of his cock to your entrance. Eager your jutted hips attempted to push him.

“What did you see out there?” he asked breathlessly.

Your head rolled, eyes open you looked at Bucky as he walked to the side of the bed. A beauty. Luscious brown hair covered a part of his face, his eyes soft as he watched you only fed the need inside you more. But you remembered his words. You were only able to turn back to Steve a few seconds before you felt him push the head of his cock in.

“I asked you a question.” Said Steve, his hand left one of your wrists snagged it at the back of your head. “What did you see?”

The pain. It was tearing you from the inside out. The tight coiling slowly wrapped around your organs. A deep tugging along the length of your spine seized up your muscles.

Tears formed but you blinked them back when you caught that constant gleam in Steve’s eyes. You remembered the women. Gaunt and strung out the image of the woman. You didn’t recognize her at first. Skinny, more than you remembered from the glossy magazines. The blond woman’s red-rimmed blue eyes were the trigger.

“Women…in the house.” You tried to speak, dryness was taking over the back of your throat. “One of them…I think…I think she was Pepper Stark.” You said licking your lips, wincing as the cramp increased.

Steve rewarded you. He stroked inside you loosening the coil for a moment. You reviled in the hot sensation in your cunt.

He stopped. “No bodies were found…”

“That’s all I saw!!!” you yelled in his face your free hand whipped to Steve’s ass as you tried to round hips enough to fuck yourself with his cock. “Please…”

“You said, women.” Steve leaned back to you. His lips brushed across your chin sending shivers down your neck.

“One with brown hair… I don’t know.,” you said desperately.

“Who is she talking about?” asked Bucky.

“Probably Hope van Dyne,” said Steve, he pulled out of you leaving you stirring in your skin. He leaned back on his knees still watching you try to stimulate yourself with his absence.

“Why would they be alive? You said their bodies were in that plane. You saw them. That’s what started this whole shit…”

Your eyes lingered on Bucky. The sweaty skin of his chest glistened under the swirl of dark hair you saw there.

“Listen…I had to do something.” Said Steve. You looked at Steve. The shape of his face made you sick and heated as you continued to rub your clit. Anything, you would have done everything to get relief.

“Something?” said Bucky, his tone and pitch dove at Steve accusingly.

Steve shrugged, glanced back down to you. His eyes greedily took in your attempts to finger yourself. “Tony would have never been on our side without her death.” He said.

“He’s not. Stark blames me! This whole war started because he thinks I killed Pepper.” Said Bucky, you glanced over to him. His brows were pointed, angry and menacing the effect only made you think about him being in your throat.

“You’re safe pal.” Said Steve, the smooth grin split his face in a maniacal smile. “Hey, let’s talk later…I’m in the middle of something here.”

Steve grabbed your wrists, pried you from your wet cunt and held you down as he entered you again. He slid in your smooth and slick cunt. His quickened breathes flowed over your skin soaking you further.

“I want some of her,” said Bucky. “Now.”

The sound of his voice moved through you. The soft pitch of it drove your need too. You turned your head to him with your begging eyes. He turned from you and walked away. The tears you tried to hold back formed anyway and dripped down the sides of your eyes.

“I’m going to die….” You moaned. It felt like a clamp was on your spine again. “Why did you do this…”

“She’s eyeing you, Buck.” Steve laughed, he drew out of you and then pushed inside. “Hurry up, I’m goin’ to cum in this little scag.” He sputtered. 

His hips jerking hard against your pelvis you felt the sting deep inside you. But distressingly and against your normal wants the drug made you love it. You were nearly salivating at the possibility of him filling you with his cum. You glanced over his face but rejected the idea of lovingly locking eyes with him. Veins pulsed and swelled at the center of his forehead, pink skin almost purple dropped sweaty flecks on to your face. He looked like he was going to burst. Steve slapped against you once and then stilled, his swampy warm cum dumped into you as he smiled.

“I hope you like sloppy seconds.” huffed Steve through a few ragged.

You felt the bed dip again. Enraptured with the feeling but still had your dignity you still refused to look Steve in the eyes, instead you settled on the fuzzy image of his nose. Bucky’s voice came from someplace from behind Steve.

“I don’t mind, _pal_.” said Bucky tauntingly.

Steve smiled, shifted inside you, still hard he liked dragging in and out of you.

From the side of his head, metal glowed it blurred as you tried to blink the effect away. It was quick, the glint glided along the bottom of Steve’s chin in a flash.

At first, you thought it was warm rain. Hot, thick, water maybe, it began to pour onto your face. Pumping out with every beat of his heart, red ribbons poured out. Balmy splashes cascaded into your nose, flooded into your mouth as you began to gag on the tangy liquid. Coughing it back up from the back of your throat, the spatters from your whoop fell back into your face.

Steve’s hold your wrists loosened. You wiped at your eyes and your face. The gooey gore slipped over your skin. The smell of metal in the air you used the back of your arm to clear your lids until finally, you could see a bit better. Steve stared into you. Brilliant blue eyes gazed lifelessly, his mouth hung open in an eternal moan. His body slumped over next to you hitting the springs with a bounce. He was still leaning down on the corner, a shirtless Bucky cleaned his long slender knife on the edge of the mattress.

You jerked your head back at the dead body of Steve. Blood still seeped out of the gash across his neck. Momentarily the air sucked out around you. Fear and adrenalin pumping through you another cramp hit your groin. Your head rolled back down to the mattress and tried to ride it out. Bucky’s broad frame came into your focus just at the side of the bed.

“You’re going to die if you don’t get a release soon.” Said Bucky, he laid the knife on the bed near your head and then held out his metal hand out to you. “Let’s get you clean.” He urged.

Your eyes fell to his open offering. “You killed him…” you said through your horror.

“He had it coming…believe me.”

The gnawing in you groin overrode the scene you had just witnessed. Bucky’s words, he was right, you knew he was but all you could think of was how the muscles in your belly were tightening up to your chest.

You reached for him and he grabbed for you first pulling you up from the bed, your feet hit the floor softly.

He held your hand in his as he began to walk toward the bathroom. You swayed as you wobbly stepped behind him. As you rounded the bed you stared at Steve’s body in a groggy high. One where you were half aware of what this meant and also in your need not caring that he was dead at all.

“I’m leaving after this,” Bucky said softly over his shoulder. He opened the door stood in the threshold allowing you to pass through first. “And if you want to stay alive, you should follow.”


	5. Bracelet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cuddles with Bucky, and on the run

You were done for. Between the satisfying ache in your groin and the splitting headache, you weakly clung to the grimy tile wall. Hair, obscured your vision as you struggled to fight against the tired soreness of your body. The shower helped with some of the intention but not dull thump in your gut. That was where your anxiousness sat. And you were not sure what would make that go away now.

The water tasted sweet. It poured over your shoulders, down your spine to the grip Bucky had on your hips.

He was going for orgasm number three, insatiable. You popped your hips back, arched a bit more to take the hits. Bucky’s thrust became sloppier, harder until he stilled to the long deep moan that fluttered from your lips at the depth he had reached. Warmth pooled inside you and when he retreated from within his hard work dripped from your tender folds. Lovingly, his touch bore with it more tenderness you had felt in years. Gently, he rubbed up your back massaging your muscles as he traveled and then inched over your shoulders bringing you back against his hard warm chest.

Bucky grabbed the soap began to lather your breasts, your stomach with as his metal hand caressed your waist.

“I won’t hurt you,” he whispered in your ear. Stubbles scraped against the patch of skin below your lobe. Bucky stared down over your shoulder carefully cleaning your skin. Once more you felt both aroused and sickened. Bucky was not safe. And the fact you were now in this killer’s arms made you more afraid. Regretfully, you needed him though. As fearful as you were, you needed the respite he offered. Because even now, standing naked being carefully taken care of that twist in your belly was loosening.

“Steve was going to kill you.” his soft voice only served as the reminder of what lay beyond the bathroom door. “After we used you…”

Your hand glided over his slipper forearm imagining a moment where death and escape were never a thought to be had. Maybe in another world, you and he would have been proper lovers. You tangled the other hand in his wet hair, bringing him closer to your neck.

“He set you up.” Your whisper was barely louder than the splash of the shower water. “You would have used me too. Then you would have let him kill me if he hadn’t have said that.”

Bucky’s hand hesitated over your breasts, rich lather dripped from your dark areolas over his hands and down your belly.

“I don’t know what I would have done.” He said deeply, you could hear the stilted breaths catch in his throat. And then gently his hand slid over to your shoulders. “I only know what I did.” He continued.

He nudged you forward under the lukewarm water. Bucky guided the water over your back rinsing you clean of the soap.

“Before all of this, what did you want out of your life?” he asked.

“I owned a café in a nothing town. I wanted to open a morning dessert shop in New York. I wanted to make savory donuts…sounds so stupid now.” You laughed, though sadness tainted the ends of it. The chuckle comes out more hoarse and forlorn than you intended.

“It’s not.”

You felt him all around. Bucky had stepped up and joined you in the now cold running water. Hugging you close Bucky clung to your waist as he buried his face in your neck.

It splashed down over your breasts. “I want to go home.” You said in a small voice. It was almost non-detectable in the whoosh of the shower. But he heard you and with a sigh, his hand came to your jaw tipping your head back to kiss you under the sheets of water.

Bucky pulled your face back from the cascade. He held you. He embraced a part of you other than your body, your soul. He broke the kiss and you stared captivated by his delicate expression. Two damaged people just trying to live. What an amazing concept, you thought. In this world where nothing seemed to remain unchanged what an adventure he could have been.

“Baby doll,” he said with the most divine tone that you could have cried. “That’s not possible,” Bucky said softly.

He slid the glass shower door open and stepped out.

A dear, almost amused, grin curled at the corner of his downturned lips.

“You’re with me now.” Said Bucky

~

Bucky tossed a dirty cloth bag at your feet.

“This is what I could find. There’s not a lot to choose from.”

You pulled your eyes off of Steve’s dead body. Bucky pushed it off the bed with a kick to Steve’s knees. Red gushes from the slit curved around his throat. Dark blood that once gave him life puddle underneath his head. Bucky threw the blanket over the giant bloody stain and looked back at you.

“Dress. We need to leave.”

You shook your head. “I don’t want to be in the middle of this Bucky.” Your heart skipped a beat and the breath in your chest felt like it stopped. “Just drop me off…anywhere but where you are.” You said though it came out hard.

Bucky tugged on his utility shirt. He eyed you for a moment. He noted your hands turning a shade lighter from all the wringing you were doing. He walked over to you.

Those blue eyes roamed over your face, to your hands where he held them in his own.

“Baby doll,” he said gently.

His voice hits your ears. Like a long-forgotten song, the low vibrato, in the end, calms you enough to sniffle back the tears forming in your eyes. Bucky wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pressed you into him. There was something elegant, a gentility, in how he held you. Maybe at the house that was for show. Perhaps it was for Steve’s approval that he had to show brutal force. But now, he was his own man.

His hands, one hard as metal the other rough both calmly stroke up and down your back as he softly hummed. A song you know is old but can’t place it. “Breath in your nose and out through your mouth baby.”

Again the words of a man who killed tried to comfort you.

“Concentrate on the end.” He said after a pause.

You couldn’t help but laugh. Nervous, though pained as it was. “What’s the end. I can’t see it.” You stammered.

“It’s being free.” He said without a second thought.

Your hands glided up his chest and leaned back, tilting your head up to stare into those radiant, gentle blue eyes. “All of them. Bucky all of them are going to come for you. And if I’m with you – they will kill me too. There is no _free_dom.“ You begged.

Bucky smiled. Not a big one but knowing in the way you were clueless to. “Get dressed.” He said and kissed the side of your mouth.

You dumped the contents out. You picked up the long sleeve shirt, a pair of men’s jeans and put them on. They are tight around your hips and breasts, but they fit better than anything else you could have hoped for.

“Where are we going?” you asked while adjusting the jeans around your groin.

He picked up his navy blue combat jacket and began to pull it on. “We need Pepper. Tony needs her, and we need Tony’s help.” Said Bucky.

You walked passed Steve’s body, down the width of the bed to your bag near Bucky.

“Bucky the world would have fallen apart anyway. It’s not like the USA is an anomaly.”

"She was a part of it. Hope and Tony had a project,” said Bucky, though he turned his head to bed. His eyes lingered on the blanket covering the bloody stain.

“I guess Steve was exposed to whatever was being produced by it. He changed. He faked Pepper’s and Hope’s deaths…to get Tony to fight.”

Bucky’s eyes fell to the knife on the edge of the bed.

Pink flooded in around his cheeks. Through the stubble you witnessed a boyish shame cross his face. You took a step nearer. At first, hesitated to touch him. Your fingers twitched to comfort him as he had done for you. Though unsure of how much familiarity he would allow you decided to take the risk. It was a reoccurring theme anyway.

Your fingers touched the opposite of his chin. His stubble pricked you as he turned his head back toward your concerned expression. There was a moment there. A chilling reminder of what his gaze held, both cold and sad Bucky could make you feel as though you were the only person in a room.

“It’s not your fault. Steve, he was a monster.” You tried to remain in eye contact. But the flash of heat in your belly pulled your eyes to his pink lips.

“I’m no different. This world has made monsters of all of us.” Said Bucky.

You were not sure how it happened. But you stood there in his arms. He had dragged you back in. His buzzing ocean of belonging flooded over and through you. And for a moment it had you floating on the surface of your trauma. His clinging to your shoulders, you sweeping your fingers through his damp hair was bliss. He pressed you into his chest where you caressed his beard. Your lips touch his. The delight of it left little room for you to exist. The borders of where Bucky and you began and started to fall away. Right there in that dirty, overused room, you lost yourself in him. You don’t give a second thought of monsters, murders, and saints. Bucky was a killer, but he was also just a man.

It was the knock that broke the moment. Hard, the bangs rattled the crappy framed motel art along the walls and shook you up too.

Bucky held a metal finger to his lips and then pointed to get behind the door. You did not second guess him and picked up your bag did as he ordered.

You pressed against the wall and held the crackling caked muddy bag to your chest.

You attempted a feeble curt smile as Bucky nodded. He opened the door and strode out leaving you with the nest of nerves coiling in your belly. The God of Thunder’s deep mumbles of greetings hit your ears. You closed your eyes and thought of something soothing. Anything would have been better than the moment when you first met Thor. Which was now churning away in your memory.

If he had tried to get in everything would have been over in an instant. Your brain was thinking fast for a change. You bent down and began to go through your bag. Running light was the key. Only the clothes on your back and a few items would be good enough to follow in your travels.

And then you felt it. There at the bottom of your bag, the cool metal grazed your fingertips. The bracelet. You picked it up and held it up to the dim light. You scanned over the shiny black metal.

Thor’s boastful laugh erupted on the other side of the door prompting you to put the bracelet on.

The pain was immediate. Black metal oozed from the edges turning silver as it came in direct contact with your skin. You scratched at your wrist, tried to rake off the thin metal but only tore open parts of your skin. The scream you tried to hold in tore from your throat. You jumped to your feet but landed on the bed as the pain seared up your arm. The metal, to your horror, felt like it was adhering to your bones and traveling up your veins. Sobs mumbled from your lips as the pain began to subside. You blinked, attempted to sit up, but it was too late, the shock to your system overcame conscious thought.

You blacked out.

Bucky’s voice said your name. For a minute you felt like it was a dream. A wonderful imagining you could lock yourself into besides the present moment you were awaking to.

The squalor of the room was the reminder. Your eyes opened to the water-stained ceiling rotting in the corners.

You felt Bucky’s hands touch your wrist, it hurt but not nearly as much as putting it so you let him inspect it.

“Where did you get this?” he asked, his hand forced you to turn and look at him rolling your wet hair over the dirty mattress. “Did you have this the whole time?” he asked again.

“Tammie’s body.” You said and then sat up holding your arm. “I guess she was a spy after all.”

The smell of cooked meat and hair sat heavy in the air. Your skin bubbled up around the seam of the silver-colored metal now buried level with your skin.

You tried not to gag. “What is this?” you said tearfully as you tenderly touched a large blister under the knuckle of your thumb.

“It’s part of a suit.”

“Hope and Tony were obsessed with it. They had hoped to fix the snap. But something else happened. I barely escaped. That was the day Hope and Pepper disappeared. Tony blamed me because I was supposed to get them out. Steve said their plane crashed. But Tony thought I shot it down.”

“Who else knew about the project?”

“Carol Danvers…you might know her as Captain Marvel.”

You gasped. Captain Marvel had destroyed France last year.

“How can a suit expose a person?” you said confused.

“Not the suit. The portal.”

~

It was easy enough to get on the quinjet.

Sam did want to go but Bucky convinced him that Steve was sleeping off his fun-time and taking you to Pennsylvania to sell you off.

Instances like this had happened enough for Sam to believe the story.

And now you and Bucky were thirty minutes away from touching down outside Pendelton Settlement outside of what used to be Port Jervis. You glanced over to Bucky. He was steady as a heartbeat as he adjusted the altitude scanned over the map and stared forward back out the windscreen.

“You know where she is?” you asked, but you could hear the fear in your tone.

“I have a good idea.”

Paranoia hit you hard. Suddenly the idea of actually stepping a foot in that wasteland left a flavor of bile at the back of your throat. “They will recognize you.” You said.

“Most likely. That’s why you are going in and not me.”

“No.” you shook when you spoke, and then softly you whispered despite the fear welling up. “No!”

“Look,” Bucky swung the flat screen toward you and pointed. “This is where they keep the girls. Right here when you first get in. You’re a healthy woman, they will take you in a.s.a.p. Find them and use this to get out.” He tossed a small flat round device to you. “Stick it on the wall furthest from the settlement. I’ll be there waiting on the other side.”

He handed you an earpiece. “And we will never be out of contact. I promise.” Said Bucky, though the roguish smile spreading over his lips left you with little confidence.

–

You didn’t blend it. Clean, and with more fat on your body than the woman standing next to you the man eyed you gleefully. His pudgy filthy fingers pressed into your mouth pulled your lips up and looked at your teeth. With breath like smog, he breathed into your face as he continued you to deem you well enough to be taken in.

“You are not from here.” He said with a stimulated sigh. It shook in his chest as he licked his lips. His hand dropped to the groin of his pants he pressed his fingers there as he stared at your mouth. “I might have to test you. Very soon.” He promised.

_“Just relax. He’s going to put you in with the good stock,” said Bucky’s voice in your ear._

The rhythm of the music reminded you of the fast beat of black metal. Rolling and thundering clashes of metal and hard strumming of guitar strings matched the dark interior. The man held you around the waist as he guided you further into the establishment.

Through the threshold gray, pink, and black satin fabric hung from the walls, the ceiling. Red plush loungers lined the sides of the wall. Each one had a few women, half-clothed, half-conscious as their dull eyes followed you in. You made a point to glance at every sorrowful face before he jerked your forward.

A large man approached. He glanced down at you before addressing the dirty man who brought you in.

“She’s not for the front. Take her to the back with the others.” He grumbled.

He took you deeper in. Down a pink neon-lit hall, you passed doors shut. Moans and screams lustfully rose above the beating of the metal music from the front. Doom. You felt dread in the pit of your stomach lurch forward with every step toward the final door at the end of the hall.

He shoved you in. The room was different. Smelled better too. It looked like a library. Books and shelves lined the walls and filled most of the space in the room. There was even a window, and through it, dawn was rising. Orange and a fusion of rose and amber began to fill the room.

_“Watch your back,” said Bucky._

“We aren’t getting out Hope.” You heard the whisper from behind a shelf in the left corner. The mention of the name soared epic optimism through enough to run to that corner.

Pepper Stark casually laid out on a more fancier version of the lounge from the front. The woman from the house, you recognized her now. Even with the dead shine from her eyes, the dark circles around them that looked far more like a black eye than tiredness.

She turned her eyes to you. Blue, but sad stared back at you.

A cold cut to your neck had you raising your head to the wooden ceiling not daring to move. “Who the fuck are you?” asked another woman.

“Are, are, you Hope van Dyne?” you asked through a shaking voice.

“Who wants to know?” she asked through clenched teeth.

_“Don’t freeze up. Tell them who sent you.” He said through the earpiece._

“Bucky Barnes sent me. I’m here to rescue you two.”

A sharp shrilly laugh erupted from where Pepper sat. You cast wide suspicious eyes toward her, still feeling the bit of Hopes makeshift blade you didn’t try to move. Only watched through the slit in your eyes.

“Rescue? With what? Your fucking asshole?” Pepper laughed again, the pitch of it probably sounded just as foreign to her as it did you because she suddenly stopped.

You chanced it. Digging into your pocket quickly, Hope pressed the knife into your neck more almost breaking the skin there. You raised the small round disk into the morning light.

“With this.” You said.


	6. Corona

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Be a hero?

You, Bucky, Pepper, and Hope stood on the bank of the Hudson River. You had successfully rescued them from the settlement, though they had probably performed most of the work but you were still proud. Even more so now, because you at least were able to keep up with them enough to get into New York City.

The epicenter of the world stood in dreary glory. You rushed behind them as they ran for an empty building, crossing the desolate street and entered it. You looked around for a second, allowing your eyes to adjust. Chairs, and checkered blue and white table clothes over round tables. To the far right a long counter with a glass display case in the middle.

“God, I feel like I’m about to crawl out of my skin.” You said, rubbing your face sweat began to drip down your neck.

Bucky walked behind the counter and you followed his heavy footfalls into the kitchen.

“It’s the city,” said Hope ominously as she stepped up behind you.

You entered the kitchen, it was a bakery. Though completely sacked in the back, old flour and rolling pins laid on the floor, broken yellow dishes pieces scattered through it.

“We need to get to the tower basement.” Said Pepper, she turned and looked back out the door of the kitchen before fully coming back in.

Bucky tensed, he started to speak but Pepper held her thin hand up in the air.

“I’ll take care of Tony.” She added, “He won’t believe you if he doesn’t see me for himself.”

“Once we’re in – we have to find out how to shut it down.” Hope placed a thin screen on the dusty counter.

For a minute there was silence. Her fingers flew over the commands. Your eyes swept from Hope’s steely determined glare at the screen to Pepper’s resilient, raw power as she clicked back the gun in her hand.

Finally, you shifted toward Bucky standing near you, he crossed his arms over his wide chest and turned toward you. A smile met you. He always seemed to have one for you now.

“Here.” She pointed to an access shaft on the corner of the screen. “This is our way in, there is also a space here.” Your eyes glided with the shift in the screen to a large rectangular box. “Most of the generated power is produced here.”

“Shut it down for good?” asked Pepper.

Hope nodded. “I think so.”

“What about going inside? Is there a program to shut it down within the basement?” asked Bucky.

“We don’t have the suit,” said Hope. “I attempted to collect pieces of it– Bosch Settlement, I was meeting someone there. Then Clint moved us.”

“Tony’s been intercepting Steve for months now. He was there. I bet he’s got most of it by now.” Said Bucky, his eyes lingered toward you.

The pain in your bones hadn’t dulled nor had it let you forget that this foreign object was attached to you. “What does this suit do?” you asked.

“We created it to enter the next dimension. There was a theory that a person could walk between realities. We wanted to get the stones, unsnap everybody back to the world.”

“Who’s _we_?” your eyes glanced at Hope’s hands as she shut the screen off.

Hope tucked the screen into the front of the combat vest. “Carol Danvers, Tony, and me. There were others there, like you.” She jerked her head toward Bucky.

“And Thor, Wanda, Steve, and Clint.” Added Bucky.

Hope stepped away, glided her fingers over the flour-dusted island. “It didn’t work. Something different occurred, a split.” She said and rounded back toward the group.

“Can you feel it?” Hope asked. “That anger in your chest?” she pointed at her own, poked it hard as she glared at you. The tightening around your ribs increased, the thump in your wrist shivered up your arm too.

“It infected Carol first.” Said Pepper.

“Her and Steve for sure.” Bucky retorted.

“But that’s what it does,” said Hope. “The portal at first drew its power from what we provided. But now…it appears to create some of its own. A self-sustaining system is developing. And the stronger it gets the more powerful the buildup. It’s dark energy. That suit was made of it, and I believe the suit is the last component to shutting the door. I think it could end this hell.”

“How is it going to end what’s going on out there?” you asked.

“It’s a reset. Can’t you see? Once we shut off the machine it will start us over.”

“But if we get all of the pieces of it-“ started Pepper.

“Well we can’t depend on what might be.” snapped Hope. “This is the best I can think of right now. We’ve got to do something.”

“Then it’s good enough,” said Bucky.

–

It was true. The space looked bigger on screen than it appeared. You laid in the shaft, below the square space was already crowded with Hope standing in front of a panel. Miles of blue, white, and red wires snaked up the shaft and disappeared above your head. Pepper and Bucky squeezed in next to her.

He motioned to you to drop into the space. With one last glance, you turned around, stuck your feet out of the shaft and began to shimming down. But faster than you intended coupled with the pain in your left wrist shot up to your elbow. In the least graceful way, your legs flailed as you tumbled down the wall.

But hands caught you. Bucky held you around the waist allowing you to slowly touch the floor.

“This shit isn’t going to work.” Hope hissed. “I can’t access it.”

“Not that it would matter now. Look.” Hope shifted out of the way. Silvery, purple light flashed and danced off the metal in the space around you. Beyond it, as you peered over Pepper’s shoulder, you could see the edge of a massive pool of energy swirl.

“You know-” A voice chipped off into the metal cavern. Pepper gasped, you watched as she turned her head toward the shaft squeezing her eyes shut. “You really should have known I would have tracked that arm,” said Tony flatly.

The blast knocked Hope into the three standing behind her. Bricks, cement, and metal bent blasted opened into the basement leaving a gaping hole.

Tony stepped into vision. Devoid of his signature armor, he only wore a smug grin. But it faded as his eyes widen when they fell to Pepper.

“Pep?” he asked.

The back of Pepper’s head bounced up and down. She helped Hope back up who stepped out first. And then Tony stuck out his hand. Pepper did not hesitate and before she was completely free of the rubble Tony had her within his arms.

“Tony, Tony. Stop. Listen.” She shushed at him as he kept trying to pull her back to him. “We have to shut that portal down.”

“No shit. I’ve been trying to do that for years.” He said. “Where have you been? I never stopped believing…I didn’t want to think you were dead.” He tried to pull her in again but she only kissed him and glanced over her shoulder.

Bucky nudged you forward, gratefully he held your arm as you stepped over the dusted concrete.

Tony stepped back from Pepper, pointed at the man directly behind. “What’s he doing?” he asked, ill content dripped from his words.

You quickly stepped to the side, near Hope to allow Bucky to clear the hole.

The pain had never left. The dull ache in the bones of your wrist ground together as the metal tightened.

Pepper stroked Tony’s chest. “He’s going to help-Tony. I have-“ she tried to speak.

“No. You killed Clint.” He jerked his hand again toward Bucky. “And from the reports, I’ve received you also killed Steve.”

Pepper started to speak, agape she turned toward Bucky eyed him for a moment. “It doesn’t matter.” She said softly.

You tried to stay aware. But a wave of pain sent searing shards of hot deep twinges up to your shoulder. “Hey.” You whispered, tried to clear your throat but another shooting pain doubled you over.

“Murdering piece of- admit it!” Tony shouted.

“Clint sold your wife. And well, Steve? You would have done the same.” said Bucky.

A weak cry followed by an even more feeble sob shuttered from your chest. “Please. Help me.”

You jerked up the sleeve revealing the raw bubbled skin of your wrist. Still deeply buried into the flesh of your wrist the metal began to turn silver. The whooshing of water echoed from behind you. Farther down the room, the source of light, the portal churned. It blurred a bit, the longer you stared at the circular eddy the louder it became. You swayed were you stood as another wave of pain crawled over your left shoulder and down your back.

Bucky was at your side before the buckling of your legs. “What’s wrong with her?” asked Bucky to Tony.

“That’s the last piece.” He blinked a few times, gestured toward your wrist and then stared at Pepper. “Why is the final piece of my suit on this woman’s body?”

“I made that suit.” Chimed in Hope.

“Nobody here is keeping count princess. I’m talking about a highly unstable metal made from the guts of universes that is attached to her wrist.”

“Take it off.” You croaked.

Hope’s voice as she spoke was icy. “It’s not that easy.”

“What was that noise?” said the voice of a woman. Her long deep red hair floated in behind her.

“I was just cleaning house, Wanda. Look what I found,” said Tony. He started toward you never taking his eyes off the device on your wrist.

“Pepper! Hope?” said Wanda. She ran to Hope and wrapped her arms around her neck. “I thought I would never see you again.” She said tearfully.

“Wait.” Tony suddenly stilled, his mask rolled over his face bit by bit. “We have incoming.”

“Carol?” asked Pepper. “Tony we have to shut it down.”

Tony’s head shifted in your direction. “There’s only one way. But it looks like we’re out of time.”

He was right. The ceiling caved in just above the group. Darkness assailed you along with asphalt, concrete, and water from busted pipes poured down. Bucky pulled you, in a direction you did not know. But you felt even weaker when you tried to help him by running too.

Steadily, over mounds of debris, you climbed with Bucky and then back down again. Finally, you cleared most of it topside with his help. A few yards away whirled the gaping pulsing portal. Passed another deafening crash light blasted and mixed with the now present swirl of silver shimmer.

Carol’s bright dusky blindly corona dimmed as she stepped near the portal.

“I wouldn’t go any closer.” Shouted Tony. “You’ve done enough damage, Danvers.”

Tony landed with a thud. And then another, though lighter, landed just behind him. Pepper, in a sleeker model of his suit, blue and silver glistened as she strode powerfully.

“Damage?” asked Carol, her voice as light as the fading fiery licks around her as she turned. “I simply freed the world. People can use the pain. Weld it like a weapon. It’s the only thing that works.”

Unable to keep your head upright it hung. Resting, you told yourself. Gushes of water trickled in between the silence. Falling from somewhere in the gaping hole behind you began to pool around your feet.

“Okay enough of the evil talk. Go away. Let us fix this.” Said Tony.

Weakly you raised your head. Bucky’s warm fingers of his metal hand turned your head toward him. Shadows darkened most of his face. But you caught the look of concern in his eyes. Other than his metal hand it was the only part of him that vibrantly shone back at you in the dark.

Carefully, he held you around your shoulders as his metal hand dropped to your injured wrist. You watched him caress up your arm until he looked back at the scene.

“Fix it?” said Carol, you saw her move from the corner of your eye as she took a step near. “That would imply that you’ve found all of it. Where is it?”

Tony’s head shifted toward Pepper before turning back toward Carol.

“Wasn’t going that route. But if you won’t go then I guess we will have to make you leave.”

Tony and Pepper, shot Carol at the same time. Quick to defense, she blasted her power raising it as a shield to their bombardment. The force of it rocked you back even has Bucky held onto you tighter.

“We gotta get out of here.” Said Bucky.

“Negative.” Tony’s voice crackled into your earpiece. “Your girlfriend has the main piece.”

A burst of energy zoomed by your body as Bucky tore you to the wet concrete.

“We’ve been hacked.” Said Tony. Rounds of his bright beams landed far too close to you.

Laughter filled your immediate area. Made of fire you shield your eyes to the rays as bright as the sun. “You put it on?” asked Carol stepping over the concrete and making the metal bars melt under her footing.

Carol bent down to grab you but Bucky hit her with his arm. It knocked her back but she hit him even harder sending him skidding toward the portal. He was running back to you when a hot vice gripped your neck. Carol yanked you up from the ground squeezing away little chance to draw in a clean breath. Your skin bubbled into blisters where she held. The smell of it drifted in around your tiny gulps through your nose as you tried to claw at her energetic invisible shield.

“I’ll take that.” Her voice filtered up to you just as your eyes stared down at her menacing grin.

You come undone. Carol lets you breathe but only so you can feel the searing pain she applies when she grabs the device melted to your bones. Tears pour from your eyes. She burns you with her touch. Controlled, the burning in your wrist intensifies to the point you aren’t sure it could be felt any harsher.

You sobbed into the shredded basement.

Red, silky energy began to wrap around Carol’s legs. Tendrils, sparkling and dense crept up her hips and around her waist. And then squeezed.

You dropped to the ground and held your wrist to your ribs. Scrambling away to your feet Bucky caught you just as volleys of energy hit you in the back. Bucky held on to you, the shots stunned parts of you, like your thighs, hips but surprisingly it felt easier now to move.

“We need the suit.” Shouted Tony.

“Take it!” you screamed as Bucky huddled with you behind a mound of debris.

“Can’t.”

“It’s already calibrated to your body.” Shouted Hope.

“She’s right. No time to recalibrate.” 

You stare at the falling droplets. It wouldn’t be so bad. Death. Better than this world, you thought. From what had unfolded within the span of a day and night the thought of a peaceful rest looked appealing.

Bucky came in close. He knelt in front you, crowded you as he grabbed for your arm.

“We gotta think of something else.”

A crash near sent piles of dirt around you. Bucky plucked you up and sat you back down away from the falling trash.

“No time. Look, Barnes,” said Tony. Bucky held your face in his hands. “I know what this means. I was going to do it myself. But if we want to close this it has to happen now.”

“This can’t happen,” Bucky whispered, the big man you had begun to admire shrunk before your eyes. His shoulders sagged as he reached in and pulled you into his arms. “Bucky.” You said softly, your hand now lost in his hair glided to his shoulder.

“Bucky, I’ll go.” You said more forcefully, with better conviction.

“She needs to, Barnes. This is the last chance-hurry!” yelled Tony.

“I’ll do it.” You said again.

“Just so you know, if you’re exposed to that. There’s no coming back.” Said Hope.

“Do you hear them?” Bucky picked you up from the ground as he spoke. “You don’t-“

“There can be more.” You broke through, maybe for good this time. You stroked his beard, dirty wet fingers caressed over his bottom lip. “This world, it can be more. I can help.” You said softly.

You held onto his shirt, leaned forward and pressed your lips to his. He tasted of smoke, wet sticky burned earth, and water. You inhaled him, tried to hang on to just how he tasted and smelled. You wanted it to last forever.

“Are you ready? Incoming.” Said Tony.

You broke the kiss. “Ready.” You answered as the first piece hit your back thrust you forward into Bucky. You tasted hot metal in your mouth. The effect was like rocket fuel and burned down the pathway of your esophagus. The metal burned away your shirt and melted right into your skin. A blast of energy rushed through you. It soothed the pain a bit but not enough to make it feel right. No, the ache of the metal adhered to your ribs, your spine as it broke through your skin.

You pivoted unsteadily toward the wind rushing over the mound of debris. The portal was close enough, but you would have to run for it.

Another piece attached to your leg, and then another to your wrist completing the armor to your left arm.

“Go. Go. Go. Go!” yelled Tony.

“Tony!” shouted Pepper.

Further behind you where there once was a shaft hidden within a blasted hole a burning object was descending. Fast, the roar of her power steadily grew louder the closer she approached.

Two more pieces attached to your legs completely the bottom half. You ran for it with Bucky close behind. You shielded your head from the barrage of concrete and metal Carol used as fodder to shoot at you.

The last glove attached. Energy, like never felt before, pulsed through you in the same pattern of the whirl of the portal. The chest piece slapped on you, knocking you slightly to the left and causing Carol to sweep passed you. You were within spitting distance. You could feel the energy of the gateway calling to the power coursing in your veins.

Carol looped around the portal. To your right, she swooped down, like a great burning ball of white and yellow. The last sleek piece slammed on to your face. And with the last addition, an enormous blast of energy exploded from the portal knocking Carol out of your way.

You skidded to a halt. You breathed into the mask, couldn’t feel on your skin. _Were you even alive anymore?_ You turned to look for Bucky, he was far away, almost back at the stack of concrete, laying on his back. You were alone and afraid of what should come next. _But how was your heart so steady?_ You should have been more fearful, but you weren’t. The old you would have sobbed the old you would have run.

But you turned back to the portal.

A call. From deep within you, it hummed up your spine and into your ears. It resonated warmth, and pain all blended into an ancient hymn of servitude. And it called for _you_.

Another one of Carol’s energy bombs blasted passed you and hit the portal.

You ran. Harder than you could have possibly imaged, you bit through the pain. The faces of loved ones passed flashed through your mind. The beautiful wondrous places you had seen but never appreciated became the background noise to the image of Bucky’s lips. Those rough hands running down your back.

And then you jumped toward it headfirst.

You disappeared into the whirling silver strobe of light.


	7. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The End ;)

Sweet caramelized sugar filled the kitchen. It was warming. Heavenly even as you began to stir in the heavy cream.

You felt content.

There was a precious ache in your chest as you watched the caramel come together. It was perfect.

You take a pinch of the salt, turn off the stove, and then sprinkled it over its magnificence.

Everything was in its rightful place because you put it there. Your business kicked off even better after the Blip. Turned out sadness sales. And oh yes, did you profit. It was easier then, plenty of room to expand in a world where so many had disappeared. People were so forgiving and appreciative to be around. The conflict had dried up in an instant after the Blip. Though sorrow still lingered, in your opinion you thought sugar was the soother to their soul. If made with love, which you always did, could turn any sad day around.

Even after the vanished returned, they couldn’t get enough of your memorable confections. It made you even more dedicated to fulfilling their demands and with it filled your heart.

Four thirty-five AM, you were tired but satisfied as you poured the caramel into a cool metal bowl. You were almost finished with your morning prep, you only had to restock the dairy, and coffee because before you knew it five AM would be just around the corner.

You walked around the island counter, noting along the way your mental checklist of things to be done. You knew them by heart anyway but you always wanted to be sure. Stepping out of the kitchen that led to your behind the counter space you glanced at the pastries that laid in rows by each type and flavor.

You cast your eyes to the two large windows. The night was quickly turning to morning. Bronze was lighting the way, fading the navy blue-black to milky lavender. You walked the short distance to your coffee machine. Simple, but efficient it was easy to prepare. Ducking under the counter to refill the coffee tub a distant light rapping on glass echoed into your café.

It wasn’t time to open, but there were always early birds. You glanced at your watch, it was ten till so it was not too out of place. Plus, your employee would be arriving soon, even in the case of more people showing up it wouldn’t be too much for you to handle alone.

You readjusted the yellow apron as you stood. There was a man there. Though you could barely make out his face in the shallow light of your café you opened the short door near the register.

Softly your footfalls against white floors padded in your wake until you reached the man behind the glass. Two bright blue eyes shone back through in the softest of expressions.

“We aren’t open for-“ you said and glanced back at your watch. “For another five minutes.” You shook your head at the silliness of it.

The locked clicked and you swung open the door for him. He carried in the soft mossy smell of the Hudson River with him. The man nodded to you as he combed a few fingers through his short dark brown hair.

“Thank you. I hadn’t realized the time.” He spoke hoarsely, though you could tell it was probably softer if he were more awake. His cheeks were flush with a bare shaven face, he flashed a boyish hooked grin down to you as he entered.

“I heard this was the best place in the city for breakfast.” He said, though this time he reminded you of someone. Distantly you remembered some of his features but nothing really stuck.

The man took off his thin jacket, endearingly; he stretched his arms with the motion and placed on the back of the chair. The glint of his metal fingers smooth over the shoulders of the jacket and suddenly hits you with ecstatic knowing.

“You’re one of the Avengers.” You said calmly, though grow acutely aware that you are now staring at him.

He looked at you from the side of his eye. Slowly he began to smile in a ‘you got me’ sort of way. Charming. Your heart even jumps a bit. And it has you smiling too as you tried to hold back a nervous chuckle.

“Sorry. You must get bothered on the regular. Please. Come to the case, pick out whatever you want.” You offered, but the Avenger turned toward you. His crystal blue eyes studied your face for a moment like he too is considering you.

“You look familiar. Have we met before?” he asked. “I’m James Barnes. You can call me Bucky though.” He held out his hand, metal and silver he offered it to you.

You took his hand. Admire the feel of the warmth of it, as you shook it, though not much different than the heat of a human hand.

“I’m certain I would have remembered.” You said, this time you did laugh, worse you giggled.

Bucky’s lips split into a wide-open smile. You let go first of his hand. Being under his handsome gaze began to heat your chest, it rose to your cheeks. Within a matter of seconds, you are flustered. Wringing your hands out as you quickly talk about the days special, the weather, and how long you will be open today.

Bucky watched you though, sucked in his lip at times, reflexively grinned when you smiled. Easily you were the sweetest person he had met in the last decade. He observed the subtle thrilled twitch of your brows. He caught every word you said, picked up on the nervous energy around you, and imagined what your lips felt like. He wondered what your silky skin felt like under his palm.

You guided him toward the case as you spoke. Bucky stared at your ass, and then down to your thighs as they rubbed together with the swish of friction from your jeans.

He considered if you thrived under pressure. The thought of your smooth skin of your cheeks pulled into worry, thrilled him a bit too much. He was currently trying to fight this tricky habit. But he couldn’t help but also think if you cracked, a bit like you were doing now by just being observed. There had to be a way of watching when you weren't looking. It would be safer that way.

_For you._

The door chimed behind you. In walked your regular morning customer. What an exciting start to your morning. Two Avengers, what a bright beginning you thought.

Steve Rogers, the wonderful Captain America, strode in with his baseball cap, dark windbreaker, and a smile for you.

“Not too late am I? Have you already picked anything out, pal?” asked Steve.

Steve stood near you, behind you peaking between your shoulder and Bucky Barnes’ left arm.

“I’ve been stalking this place for a year now. Everything’s delicious.” Said Steve.

You turned back to the case glanced at your work. Steve did something he had never done. His hand now rested on your shoulder, and glided down with a warming pat.

Bucky turned a bit, but still wanted to be close he casually pointed at the bacon topped donuts. He took in the dark color of your eyes, they brightly gazed at him intermittently as you gestured toward another donut. You were probably different in your private moments. Freer.

He could think of a few ways of finding out. More than a few actually.

Bucky glanced over to Steve who was already staring at him from behind you. A charming grin curled in the corner of his lips. A knowing gleam in his river colored eyes twitched with a wink before ducking in close to your temple and pointed to a row of kolaches.

Steve had said you were special. He was right. Bucky watched you scribble on a pad you brought out of the pocket of your apron to take their order. You would come to take more than that, he promised. He smiled when you gazed up at him with another question. He told you what he wanted.

You tell Steve you knew his order by heart and then walked away. Bucky wanted to be in your heart too. The undercurrent of jealousy spiked but he controlled it. Like a professional.

Bucky was an Avenger, after all.

He was one of the _good guys_.


End file.
